My husband's been a bit down lately. It's a combination of things - approaching fifty and working in a job he hates. It's not teaching he dislikes exactly, just the school he's at - it's understandable, given what's going on there, but that's for another story. When people are feeling down the best thing you can do is listen and be understanding, and try to get them out of their heads. To me, nature is the best medicine. Nature, food, love, exercise - all very good anti depressants.
Being winter down here in the southwest of our state, it's perfect for hiking. It might be awfully muddy, cold and raining, but hey - this just means mushrooms, platypuses, edemic black snails and other cool things that come out in the rain. The whole world smells of mycellium and animals. It's just divine and makes my heart soar. Fuck medication, think forestation. Add a waterfall and a rainbow to that mix, and you're bound to feel a little lighter. We spend a long time sitting and letting the flow infused into our bones.
Though he's a bit bored of going to the same places, I remind him it's not about going to find new places, but enjoying what we have, stretching our legs, breathing, filling ourselves with exercise endorphins and getting out of the house. By the end of the seven kilometre walk, he was smiling - just.
We headed to the sea to make lunch, setting up our fantastic outdoor kitchen on the Defender. By this time the rain had cleared and the sun was out. We even saw whales out to see.
I'd already made vegetable soup, thick with swedes, potato, beans, silverbeet, fennel and lots of parsley, so it was just a matter of heating it up. I had some stale Turkish bread and was disappointed to see I'd forgotten the cheese and butter to make toasties - but never mind, I'm good at inventing stuff! I made fried bread with spices - lots of fennel seeds, dried garlic, and a harissa powder. Absolutely delicious and totally transformed the garlic bread.
We did have a little visitor try his luck. Cockatoos in this town are a pest - they have learnt to get into the bins and land on tables hoping to get food off tourists.
Later he'll snuggle in on the couch and say thankyou for pulling him out of his head. He'd do the same for me. We both know what work as anti depressants, and aren't afraid to use them liberally and generously.
What brings a smile to your face when you're feeling down?
With Love,
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Being in nature is definitely a good start. I work online, so pretty much anything analog is a welcome break... particularly when life is bringing me down.
It definitely reminds you there's something bigger than yourself, and your attention is pulled to real things, as opposed to the nonsense that can sometimes accumulate and shout at you!
I love this post , I got encouragement from it , I will not give up as well.
I am @wallay
Oh, I hope so! Go out in nature and breath. There's a lot of joy in the world when we look in the right places.
@riverflows
Nature is a great thing that we have received. It has a positive effect on mental health. Relaxing in a natural environment like walking in the park, hiking can help reduce stress levels.
Very true. I read a quote once that said that there's no problem a good walk won't solve.
The very best advice, well said @riverflows - get them out of their heads!
I need that lesson myself sometimes!
Totally agree, I wouldn't remember one time where strolling through forests hasn't worked!!
Going in the water is also a great way, if you are into it:)
When I was in Grammar school, the masters all wore cap and gowns if you misbehaved you got the cane! it was a strict but fantastic school, I turned out OK as a result.
Spare the rod, spoil the child.
Should I beat my husband? :P
True though, we do seem to live in an age when parents and kids are always right and the teacher doesn't know anything. Depressing indeed.
No! don't go beating the teacher, that sets a bad example, lol
I'm glad you were able to bring some joy to his life. It's really hard when your mate has to work in a job they hate. My husband did the same for the last 10 of the 17 years he worked. It took 10 years for the nightmares to abate...
Oh gosh that's a long time. Yeah it's tricky at the moment. Just trying to save enough to have a year's buffer to figure out what next. I can't have my love miserable, that's for sure.
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I think you have a great outlook! I think walking and just being in nature is a tremendous antidepressant, particularly because it's free, unlimited (you can always go in nature,right?) and always an opportunity to discover new things. So it's a sort of promise of a very easy way in which life might be good again. :)
I love this! Yes! A little reminder too.
Nature is magical in every sense. It's great you had a chance to get outdoors. The seaside view is amazing, and the food - ahh, I might just break the fast I already started. Dang. XD
It is easy for me to relate to the job part. In my 50's my self employed programming consultant work was winding down with the rising $3/hr asian competition, which drove me into the arms of the corporate world of AT&T. At least they let me work remotely.
The turning 50 thing does not get too much sympathy from one that is in his last year of his Three Score and Ten life warranty.
Let me also add, that he should be greatful each day for having someone like you as his partner.
Coming from a cancer survivor let me remind him that every day's a blessing. βπ
Sometimes it's hard, when you're in it, to put things in perspective. And I think he's trying to prevent having to be miserable until he hits three score and ten - 25 years can seem not long at all and an eternity of being miserable.
It's hard sometimes, when he loves me so much and counts himself lucky to have me, as I don't want to be THE ONLY good thing, as he says sometimes. I find it frustrating and upsetting, though I'm grateful to be loved. Hopefully we'll reach a point where he's independently happy.
I think everyday's a blessing and I haven't even been ill - it's from watching my father with cancer. I just wish the hubs would embrace this concept a little more.
Sorry, today's a rough day all around.
Sorry if my comment sounded insensitive to his feelings.
Oh no it didn't at ALL! - I know you better than that. xxxx
Nature and love cures all. Why do we even need all the other stuff?
EXACTLY! Although - tacos are pretty good.
I totally agree nature is the best medicine and glad this outing helped your hubby get out of the downs, I was lucky I loved my job for most of the time I worked, just the last two years as I approached retirement I got frustrated with it, my boss new I was planning on retiring and started cutting my workload then and honestly so much so it got boring.
Funny thing is when I complained to him with about a year to go he said to me, I needed to phase you down or retirement would have hit you hard, and explained he had divided out my work load and the portion he had taken off me already was now being done by four people, and the workload I had left was more than anyone else in the office and I am complaining of being bored, just proved his point he needed to slow me down.
At the time I thought he was talking rubbish, but looking back I am glad he did get me slowing down before I retired
Isn't that funny? Sounds like he had your best interests at heart, though I understand it would have been frustrating - sounds like you were working way too hard!
yes looking back I do believe he did have my best interests in mind