I am Motherf***ing Charles Ingalls! Hive Garden Championship. OH no, wait, herm...Garden Journal August 2022

Bro I haven't done that in forever, I don't even know how it work.

Mic check: "Toc toc toc, you can hear me ok?"

Welcome to my monthly post, it took me all the motivation in the world to gather my thoughts, my pretty pictures, and muster my courage to start transfering pictures on dinausor laptop, Ha! which remind to let you know that I'll get a new laptop soon, it was apparently the processor, yeepee.
Anyway where was I? Oh yeah, muster my courage to finally write a post about my garden.

I spent the entire month of July taking pics for my IG (that means Inner Growth)
We still have eyes on Spain for September, in the meantime I am making sure the food is growing, the herb is herbing, and the flower flowering.

Oh man, it's in my garden, but I forgot the story about this flower. @rubido brought that plant a few years back, before we even moved in, so I guess we should ask him what's up. I remember it's a crazy story, and you can also eat the fruit, smoke the flower, all that. How trippy is the pistil?

So the courgette/marrow above, is from our neighbor, thank you very much, and the spinash looking thing below is called chard, I did a quiche with feta with it, I made a picture but the kitchen is dirty, and there's no way I am showing you my filth right now.

I actually roasted the stems seperately, and boiled the leaves. Cool beans....Let's move on!

Oh yeah speaking of beans, I planted some bush beans, which now are looking good, with the dripping system going at first, now I water the trench once a day, we're experiencing the hottest temperature recorded in 40 years or something like that, you know how much I trust the radio these days, but nonetheless, I try to water as little as I can as there is already restrictions.

You're thinking, "did that mofo just did a slow motion on that mother flipping gif?"
Yes he did, son, yes he did.

This was me showing you various vegetables, I am not going to show you everything, because it's a lot of veggies, but we got pumpkins for days, maybe too many butternuts, too many potatoes, pickles the size of cucumbers, too many radishes and everyone hate my radishes.
You want some radishes bro? They're very peppery.

We got some Ed dangling

We got them watermelons of course, I mean come on bro...Toc toc toc...Sounds ready to go...

I found some Datura just doing its thing in the garden, for those that aren't familiar with it, it's a highly poisonous plant, that I had to pull out as it's not super safe for kids, the flower is so pretty though! Back in our days, my friends were boiling the plant and trip balls for an entire week.
I remember hosting "friends" for an afternoon tea party, and they brought a concoction made of datura boiled for hours. They knew what they were doing, some people actually use it as medecine, but you really need to know you dosage, and the plant in general. It's also called the devil's weed, moonflower, devil's trumpets, thornapples, and jimsonweeds.
The fruits that the plant produces, are like spiky balls (ouch), the seeds are also known to be psychoactive, such a pretty plant, but very dangerous, like most pretty things.

Let's move on!!!

This year, I've almost only grown cherry tomatoes, because they are the only ones that the kids are ok to eat. So it's cherry tomatoes on everything, with mozarella, feta, in a quiche, salad, I am trying to get the whole crew to stay healthy, but to be honest, with the heat, everyone is just losing so much weight!
Everyday, I pick some fresh ones, so sweet and just perfect on everything. Oh I even made a sort of a roasted aubergine and cherry tomatoes on toast recipe the other day, it was diiiviiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine.

Now let's take a break from the living, thriving garden to check on the chicken for a minute:

They still don't have names, it's better this way. I don't understand why, but the dogs just stop attempting to eat them, and they all seem to live in harmony. Maybe it's just too darn hot to even try to hunt 😅 They're getting cocky though, shiting on my front porch.

They seem to stay alive for now, good on them.

Oh I almost forgot, I know it's not always healthy to compare courgette sizes, but here is the one I am growing this year, compared the neighbor's. Once again, size don't matter, unless mine is bigger, and then it matters very much.
I'll show you all my courgettes next time, promised.

perspective trick used in the industry

Oh yeah , my first pumpkin of the year, yeepee! You wanna see my plant? Ok maybe that's good to finish on a high note. There were supposed to plenty of other stuffs, but it's 2am now, and too much of a good thing, can be deadly, like that Datura plant.

Next time I'll show you my figs, my nuts, they'll will probably be all dried up by this weather...Giggity...