It's been thirty five years, but doesn't seem that long ago sometimes - at others it seems like a lifetime - my lifetime. I was seventeen and a half, more an adult than teenager, however my short span of life had left me largely inexperienced in the ways of the world...but my mother told me I had to leave home nonetheless.
Within three hours I had my things packed up and I was gone.
Learning to fly
I've learned a lot of lessons and they weren't always easy ones - Flying can be difficult.
Through trial and error, good times and in harsh and brutal ways I learned my life-lessons. I fumbled along, sought knowledge and understanding, training and guidance and, slowly, made my way forward. It was like learning to fly. Fortunately, when pushed out of home I didn't crash and burn though - I went through many trials and tribulations and failed a lot, but over time I put the lessons into practice, stood up after each failure as was my nature and I'd been raised to do, and pushed forward with life as best I knew how.
Plummeting downwards
It happened, sometimes a lot - life's like that - and for that reason it still happens.
I don't fall every day and I didn't back then as a seventeen and a half year old either; but fall I did and sometimes it hurt and took so much from me that I didn't think I could get back up and keep going...but no matter how fast or far I fell, I got back up, every time. It's that stubborn refusal to quit and the ability to think laterally and look for solutions, that helped me find my feet (and wings); that, and a deep-seated ability for persistence, to be resolute and steadfast and to be true to myself and my beliefs. I owned my life and took responsibility for the attitudes and actions I made.
Levelling out
I found, the more mistakes I made the more I failed and the more I learned; I became better for it.
I'd often recall the words my father said: The failures you endure prepare you to be the sort of person to achieve and accept success provided, you learn from them and try again. Simple words, but added to my intrinsic attributes and those I learned I was left feeling more in control of my journey and that led to the thoughts, attitudes and activities that moved me forward with more confidence each time...I learned, failed and learned again. Consistency and persistence, and my never-quit solutions-focus, began to level me out.
Then I flew
Dealing with, and learning from, failure brings a better chance at success. I've had a lot of both.
There's many ways to define success and it doesn't always mean momentous things. Only yesterday I successfully paired my new smart TV remote to the PayTV box; not a momentous thing, but success nonetheless. In my life I've had many successes and have been lucky fortunate to have worked hard enough that some of those successes have been truly magnificent, life-changing one could say; but the small successes are also valuable.
I'm not one to hold out for the big things in life, I believe it's all the little things that can be done with more regularity or happen more often that are fulfilling; a lot of small things combine into something larger...I call that larger thing, my life. Big things happen also though. I remember a moment when I seemed outside of myself and saw my last six years objectively. I realised that I'd been flying, that I'd taught myself to do so and I felt proud of the achievement; that was a big moment, understanding the achievement I'd attained. I was twenty three and a half years old at the time, and that day was the day I got married.
Soaring
There are no self-made men or women on the planet; not one. Everyone has been helped at some stage.
Thinking back on some of my successes makes me smile; I don't mean solely because of the achievement of the goal, the success, but because of the things that brought the achievement into being. One doesn't fly without working for it and it's that effort I look back on and feel good about as well. I've also been fortunate to have people around me in support and whilst a lot of what I have achieved is directly because of what I have personally done, there have been those who have helped me fly and to them I'm grateful - it's unlikely I could have been as successful in my life without them.
Could I have found the same level of success without help? No. Could I have achieved it without a lot of hard work and effort on my part? Of course not! So part of what I learned along the way is gratitude, generosity, the ability to say sorry and genuinely mean it; the ability to unashamedly show a great deal of respect to those who deserve it and to recognise that I'm responsible for my life and to work hard to make it a better one, no matter what, but I need other people too and I've had a small few around me thankfully; they've helped me soar.
Flying, falling and life
Scratch the surface and you'll find some dirt on me, scratch a little further and you might find something bright and shiny also; a diamond beneath the dust? Maybe.
I've held grudges, burned bridges, broken people and hearts. I have been brutal in thought and action, callous and destructive; these things make me human. I've also risked everything for others selflessly and willingly, been tender, kind and caring, loved with my whole being and a million other things that some just might look upon and celebrate. The pendulum of life swings both ways with human beings.
I work to a code of honour and integrity, as I see it, and I know some may question some of my actions, but I own them; to do otherwise would be to lie to myself and place doubt upon the validity of my journey, my flights and falls. They've all contributed to the me I am right now and can't negate any of them. I have broken habits and created better ones but I'm no angel, I'll dance with the devil again, it's inevitable, I believe I'm on the right path towards being better than I used to be though, day by day, and I work at it, like we all should.
Thirty five years of flight
I remember that day I was told to leave home and how I felt. I'll not share it, but it felt something like falling and not knowing where the bottom is.
I didn't hit the ground that day though and, looking back, know that it was the best thing that could have happened to me and my life is better for it; I found myself that day and every one afterwards and to this very moment I continue to do so. My flight didn't truly begin that day though as my life leading up to that moment has also contributed to the sum and total of my life, but I count that specific moment as one that defined me as an individual and it put me on a ledge from which there was no way back.
I had to fly or fall; learn to celebrate the flights and learn from the falls whilst I picked myself up.
I'm the exact version of myself today because of every single thought, attitude, action, success and failure in my life and I can't change what happened before this very moment in time; I don't want to either.
I just keep learning to fly and each day I fly or fall commensurate to the effort I put in or life's happenstance; I'm lucky to have the attributes that help me move in the right direction in life generally, and to own my successes and failures.
My mother is gone now and I have wondered, if given the chance, if she might change her decision to kick me out of home at seventeen and a half years old, and with no warning. I never went back home to live and not once in life asked her for assistance from that point in time. Stubborn? Yeah, I guess, but I'm glad I did not. That event, leaving home, caused me to orchestrate my life the way I saw fit and I believe I've led a good one despite the things I've seen and done, the good or the bad. It taught me to be me, to be humble and kind, to stand up for myself and what I believe in and to take ownership.
I feel equipped to fly into the rest of my life knowing that, come what may, I'll deal with it decisively, learn from it and put myself into flight after each fall.
Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default - Tomorrow isn't promised so be humble and kind
Any images in this post are my own
In my view, in order to learn in life you have to make mistakes, you fall and can capsize many times but just as many times you have to get up and start again.
Reading your words moved me they are inspirational. Excuse my bad english 😅
Mistakes are going to happen, and it's through them we learn, or should learn.
I once knew a person who was so afraid of making mistakes that they failed to begin many things; it got to the point the person was so scared of beginning anything out of fear of failing at it that they backslid into a very terrible mental state. It's not a good way to be. Alas, many are like this, maybe not to the degree of the person I mention above, but so many don't attempt things out of fear of failing at them. I don't think that's a good way to be.
Thanks for your comment and kind words and, don't worry, your English is fine. (Way better than my Italian is!)
Heh heh thank you so kind. However I think it's not a good way to live not doing things out of fear, in the end you're left alone with your regrets. Better to try and fail than to remain in doubt of how it could have been right?
I agree completely, failing is an awesome thing to do; it means one has tried to make something happen in the first place. Learning from it and retrying is the way to find success.
I salute your for striving hard to live without even asking support to your parents. I guess you've learned so much about 35 years of flying. Everything has its own purpose. For sure you still thank your mother for doing so.
Indeed, but not just to live, I strive hard to live my best life.
Thanks for your comment.
Definitely🥰
You're welcome.☺️
It made me into tears since I also packed up out from my family when I was 9 years old because of my health condition. I neverthought that I could live until today, I am now 42 and a degree holder.😇 Salute you Sir!
You lived by yourself as a nine year old? That must have been tough.
I leave my parent in the mountain because our school was too far.. I am ashmatic since then. I went to my sister's house in the city so I could continue my schooling in grade 3. It was a very big sacrificed to both of us with my parent. I was then the youngest among siblings of 4. The house of my sister in the city have motorcycle for me to ride going to school. If I walk 2kilometers from home to our school, I reached our school so tired and came home breathless. I decided to stay in the city and thanks God, I became a teacher with master degree in Mathematic. I just graduated my masteral last few months. Still, I am a sickly woman without child. 10 yrs ago, doctor removed my spleen.
That sounds like you would have had to find a lot of determination to find the success you wanted.
I lost my parent, I have my husband, my siblings with children. I dedicated my life to them. My father died last few months ago.
When I read your post, I remember how I fly too. I encourage myself to be a well determined woman and entrust the power of God whom I believed giving me the full strength to survive.
I read you Galen and I identify with that of flying, falling, and rising again with a lot of humanity, solidarity, and professionalism... I subscribe to this phrase of a brave woman "Why do I want feet if I have wings to fly " by Frida Khalo
When you are clear on the steps Avvanti!!!💜
I like to fly...but I like to have feet too, where else would I put my boots?
Always on earth Galen you put your boots and the sky is the limit, we have in front of us all human nature at our disposal, to admire, love and respect it, because everything around us is art in its purest form.
I agree...but humans don't respect nature generally, they destroy it.
It is true, Galen the human destroys and to think that nature cleans all the bad, renews and gives brightness to our being with those beautiful "wings" to reach our goals.
It's always heartwarming reading your posts. I'm always encouraged by it. For the past few months I've been feeling like time has passed me by quickly and I'm not even close to what I want to achieve in life yet. I see way younger peeps making waves and doing so well for themselves and its like I'm stuck in a place. Then one day I came across a post whereby the person said its not too late to fly and some people actually reached their heights at ages like 30, 40 and even 50years. I'm still in my twenties which means there is still time for me and that encouraged me and I stopped feeling pity for myself. Each experiences we passed through in life, both the good and bad has a way of shaping us and molding us into what we are today. Sometimes those experiences needs to happen in order for us to come out stronger. I will keep on trying every single day to fly higher than I did the previous day. In as much as there is still time, who knows what tomorrow holds? Not everyone get to live the years they want to so it's better to treat each day like its the last.
Thank you so much for this wonderful post.
One day, you'll be old and die...Or, one day you'll just die, you might not be old. If that's not motivation enough to get you on track then nothing will.
The thing is, you need to stop looking at other people and start looking at yourself; they don't have the ability to make things happen for you, you do. They also can't motivate you better than you can motivate yourself because if you do it yourself, you're more likely to follow through.
You talk about 30, 40 and 50 as if it's old. Sure, it's older than you, but it's the wrong attitude to have I think...You should see the future as an opportunity that starts in the present.
Thanks for your comment, I appreciate it.
This is absolutely right. The best person to motivate you is yourself. Even if you see 100posts about motivations and you yourself fail to do so, it won't change much.
Not at all, what I meant was if people older than I am don't give up and they still achieve greatness, who am I to feel sorry for myself. That was what I was trying to say.
Surviving each day ain't easy and having the best attitude and positive look on life is something that might be difficult too given the series of unfortunate circumstances life through at us. It's a constant effort each day to remain on the right track, never give up, never lose hope, stay motivated and keep on flying.
My mistake. You are right...I think older people, those who have been through a few things understand a little better. Time and experience doesn't always bring wisdom, but a lot of the time it does.
An effort worth making.
Each of us has to learn how to stand when we are knocked down because falling in a heap and staying there isn't much of an option right?
Here's the thing Gloria, fly. And if you think you can't, then find out how to. It's not easy, it's fucken hard, but it's worth it.
Feel free to hit me up anytime, I'm always happy to offer some direct and forthright guidance.
Be your own hero Gloria.
I'm going to hold unto this as much as I can. I will keep trying and will try my best never to give up.
Thank you so much 🥺🙏🙏. I will surely need them. Most days I don't even know what the hell I'm doing. Why I find most of your posts uplifting. Thank you so so much once again 🙏🙏🙏. I truly appreciate it.
You're welcome...Now, start flying today. It's a mindset.
My dear such is life as a successful human we have to learn from our mistakes in order to make it in life. Because our experience is the best teacher us.
Experience is one of the teachers in life for sure, but not the only one; A combination of several different methods is most likely to lead to a better result than one alone.
Your life story motivates me to dare to fly even though I know I will fall, at least I have tried.
Fly! Or at least attempt to.
The thing is, even when you fall there's something to be learned, benefit to gain. It's those things that help move you towards your desired outcomes next time...or you fall again and then try again. Constantly improving your thoughts and attitudes will help you get your actions on track and that's what's going to put you into flight. There's no time like the present either, fly now!
Of course, don't go jumping of any bridges or buildings, mountains or any other high place...we're talking about flying in a figurative sense only...But fly yahli, dare to do something different or that makes you feel uncomfortable...it's in that place you'll begin to see the gains.
General Norman Schwarzkopf said, "True courage is being afraid, and going ahead and doing your job anyhow, that's what courage is."
Find it and fly.
Also, I noticed you self-voted your own comment. That's not really the done thing around here. Just letting you know.
very true as you said, falling is not the end, as long as we can still move, we can still try and try again, until we can achieve what we want.
Actually God has determined everything, all we have to do is try and don't give up, because God hates people who are hopeless.
Mohon maaf atas apa yang terjadi pada komentar saya,karena menurut saya,memilih diri sendiri untuk kesenangan karena jikalau orang lain tidak memilihnya,setidaknya saya punya satu pemilih. tetapi kalau perbuatan yang saya lakukan itu salah,saya akan merubah kedepannya.saya punya hati yang lemah dalam hal ini.
I'm non-religious so don't believe this - I believe I'm responsible. Also, what sort of god hates hopeless people? I'd say, not a very good one.
This dilarang putus asa yang membuat saya berkata demikian.
Kalau anda bukan-religius maka lupakan
I don't speak whatever language that is above, sorry.
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very inspiring .
Thanks.