The time and space to hope with a scarcity mindset

The last couple days I have struggled to get to Hive as much due to the work going on in the home. But, I started using https://engage.hivechain.app/ by @arcange, which is an interface to help commenting and while I haven't explored it all, at a basic level it is very easy and fast to comment, at least on a PC. Not sure if it works on mobile. Worth checking out for sure.

And then, one of the benefits of having my hands, body, hair and glasses covered in paint is, I don't have my phone on me most of the time. This meant that I was pleasantly surprised this evening (it is 2am now) when I saw that my crypto portfolio values had edged up slightly, rather than the freefall they have seemingly been in for the last few months. I still hold a lot of shitcoins from the old days, and they have been performing true to their name.

But, a few others have even made some grounds against BTC and I noticed that in the latest surge of Bitcoin, they didn't drop quite as hard against it and maintained their position. Does this mean that people are tired of selling their alts? I don't know as I don't spend much time analyzing the markets, but I do hope that we will start to see some positive movement alongside Bitcoin from now.

Hope doesn't count for much.

But, it is still good to be hopeful, as long as one is also actively working toward where they want to be. There is no point in hoping for a different outcome and waiting for it to happen.

As I have mentioned before, not everyone is cutout for crypto and this isn't just to do with personality, it also has to do with the immediate conditions. If one is living in conditions of plenty, it is easier to take risks and patiently look forward to long-term highs. If one is in need with low resources, then it is much harder to manage with the situations, especially the negative.

For those that remember the last highs in the community back in 2017/18, you will know that on the platform there was a lot of positivity and charity. There was value flowing all around and people didn't even care about all the abuse that was going on - just let it ride. That of course changed as the price started to slide and then continue and continue to slide.

When times are good, everyone can manage.

Have you ever been in the position where you are flush with cash and don't mind splashing a little around, buying a round or two at the pub? Have you also held the position where you are at that same pub, with the same friends - but are broke and unsure where your rent payment will come from?

I have been in both situations and the latter more often than I would like - though I don't frequent pubs, especially if broke. It stresses me. Nothing stresses me more than a lack of financial availability and I don't need much. I have a feeling that this has been the case since I was quite young, where I was raised in an environment where the shortage of money was always a focus.

With my own current conditions with the house renovation and the blowouts in budgets, I have recognized that familiar feel of the scarcity demon creeping up behind me and my body wanting to run.

It is in this feeling that I recognize I am not really cut out for the trader life either and "fantasize" of just selling it all and getting out of crypto completely. Life would be so much easier if I didn't have to worry about how my portfolio was doing. I could just take what I have, pay what I can with it and go on living a life like the 99% who aren't in crypto. They seem happy.

But, are they? Would I be happy to go back to that life knowing what I know now? Or is it that once the red pill has been taken, what has been seen can't be unseen? It is strange to think about disengaging from crypto and it is not a god strange, it is more scary. I have so much of myself riding on the success of a yet to be fully proven industry, that I should be scared of losing what I have - which I probably am - but it scares me more to think about losing my position in the market, even by choice.

In this way, I understand why a billionaire who is judged as greedy because he doesn't retire, doesn't retire. It must be incredibly hard to have invested so much of a life into something for so many years and then just give it up because you are "at an age" that you are supposed to. After all, I think it would be incredibly hard for me to just walk away from all of this and I have only been working and investing into this for less than four years - not four decades.

For me to walk away, it would have to be something cataclysmic in my life, which would mean something negatively concerning my family. In a dire family situation, I would drop it immediately - but economic hardship isn't dire for us, at least at this point. We are just struggling and we know why and believe that in time, we will be okay. This belief it will be okay is a big factor in being able to face up to whatever challenges arrive and be resilient enough to survive.

Just before we bought the house was the last time I bought crypto with fiat, as since then, everything has been poured directly into the house, plus more. But, I am lucky, as this is crypto and Hive and there are more ways to invest than using disposable income - I can invest with my work and earn a little through the holdings I have in various ways, namely curation for me.

This takes some of the fear out of the investment, as what I am losing is time and effort, it is not taking food off the table in any other way, as I am still maintaining my normal work (though Corona has impacted my business heavily) and I can do most of what I do in my "spare" time, which is after everyone goes to bed, lunch breaks and the odd afternoon.

This means that this potential revenue stream is my investment position for the future, but perhaps more importantly, it gives me a psychological anchor that I can use to control my stress when that scarcity feeling arises, as I have the belief that it will "be okay" and I am working toward that end. Having the sense that what I am doing is useful and valuable toward improving my situation, makes me hopeful, as when we work for something, we do it under the belief there is a chance of it actually working, that it isn't hopeless. Even an act of desperation is done with the understanding that there is a chance it will work.

So, while hope doesn't count for much on it's own, combined with activity toward what one is hoping for to happen brings a sense of meaning to what is being done. And when we have meaning, we act with purpose and that is, we invest ourselves.

I am probably not cut out for the crypto life in the way a trader is, as I may have too much of a scarcity mindset which evokes too much stress in me - but since there are more ways to crypto than as an investor, I am able to find a way that not only suits me, but calms and energizes me in a way that allows me to cope with the other stresses in the field. I might fantasize at times about dropping the blue pill and "getting out" but, it isn't that easy when you love what you do - even though in order to do what you love, you have to also cope what you don't.

It'll be okay. I hope.

Taraz
[ Gen1: Hive ]