Sharing and legit hug-moments

in Weekend Experienceslast year

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Expect problems and eat them for breakfast.

- Alfred A. Montapert -



I need to see you. It wasn't a question.

Trinity is always to the point, something I responded to the moment I met her several years ago; she's not abrupt, just economical with words and those five in her message said more than, I need to see you. I knew something was up.

I've not seen Trinity for almost two months, our jobs get in the way, although we always have good chats, and that's not just because we think alike, but because we like and respect each other. Anyway, she confirmed that something was up in her message but, of course, I didn't push her on it, we'll talk at breakfast...That happened last Saturday.

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Her situation is private, complicated and related to matters and subjects I'd rather not talk about on the blockchain. It is also serious in nature and, the more of it I heard the more I believed she'd done the right thing by calling me - I'm connected in certain ways to the right people and that's why she came to me.

We ordered coffee and breakfast, you can see my scrambled eggs, crispy bacon and wilted baby spinach on rye toast above, and got down to talking and devising a strategy.

Three hours later, we hugged and parted ways. In case you don't know, I'm the worlds' best hugger, and she's the worlds' second best, so that hug-moment was pretty legit. It was probably far too legit to be honest, but that's ok, it ended...eventually.

Later that day I reflected on the situation and also the ease at which some people divulge the most personal and private things.

Trinity is a good friend, someone I'd go out of my way for, I guess sharing as much as she did felt ok because it was me, but it's not something I'd do myself; I tend to keep things quite private only sharing the basic thing. Maybe it's my age, fifty two, and that Trinity, at thirty three, grew up in an environment that was more social-media-oriented and in which sharing, often over-sharing, is more acceptable and comfortable to do. I don't know, but sometimes I think it's odd the way people open up and share the most personal of things.

I spoke about it with my girl-person later on Saturday night and she agreed; whilst younger than I am she sees personal information in the same way I do, that is, something to be kept private. She also told me I needed to get with the program as far as younger people go and that this habit/need to share everything is normal these days...I don't think I will get with the program though - I'm happy to be very distant to the program. You can't teach an old G-dog new tricks after all...Well, you can, but only if he wants to learn them.


So what's up y'all? What are your thoughts on the sharing, or over sharing, of personal or private information in person with friends or online? Have you had any experiences with it, or do you have any funny over-sharing stories to tell? Do you keep things very private like I do? Feel free to comment below, but only if you want to share of course.


Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default - Tomorrow isn't promised so be humble and kind

All images in this post are my own

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I've got a couple years on you, too... and yes, Private. As in Private!
Around dinner, couple nights ago, our conversation was exactly this subject. And ym two daughters, 24 and 26?
Nope. Little was NOT shared, with friends, casual friends on on Insta!

I dunno, maybe you're right, and I am an old-mansy dinosaur?

It seems so obvious that private is private right? Seemingly not though. It's a brave new world.

I get it with respect of some things and with close friends and family, but even then I believe there's things that shouldn't be shared. It's situational I suppose.

We may be oldmansy dinosaurs mate, but I much prefer the good old days to the bad old present.

this whole subject makes me pucker.

Oh, shoot, was that too much of an overshare?

😉

Haha!

Girl person? Okay, that made me smile. :)

Some people think I am hiding things because I'm private. It's not about the deep, dark secrets, but, why would I want to? What is this incessant need to put your life on display? I'm with you on this.

My friends dont need to ask, because they probably already know. If they don't, its probably better off that way. Funny enough, my kids are not into the tell all, so maybe they are out of step.

Breakfast looked good!

Hi, Galen!

Girl person? Okay, that made me smile. :)

Lol, just a term I made up a little while ago; if it fits then why not huh?

Isn't it funny how people put others on trial simply because they choose to be selective with the information they share? Weird world huh?

People ask stuff too, with seemingly no thought to the fact the question may overstep somewhat. How much do you earn and how much crypto do you have, are just a couple of doosies! People are such wankers.

I share things with certain people and some know a little more than others, but no one knows it all, despite them thinking they do.

I hope you're well Swigles.

There’s similar levels of problems with being “private” and “oversharing”. Major problem with the former is that things that are actually problems don’t get aired, recognised and resolved because “privacy” (and I am otherwise pretty big on at least other aspects of privacy), and that’s how a lot of people can just continue being worthless dirt bags for way too long.

Major problems with the latter are mostly along the lines of not thinking about how information can be used once it’s “out there” (the person you told might tell one of their trusted people who might tell one of their trusted people who might…, maybe someone overheard and decided to blackmail or otherwise be an asshat about it) or the person dumped on may not be mentally or emotionally capable of handling the information they’ve suddenly received.

Like with everything else I think details are situational and it’s probably not the best idea being all the way one way or the other 😆

Like with everything else I think details are situational

I agree completely.

I'm a bit late with this comment but I need to step in still. I see your breakfast is untouched still. I suppose you don't like it. Can I have it please?

Lol...well about 10 minutes after this photo was taken the plate looked quite bare indeed...I stopped short of licking it though. Maybe you can just turn up next time, choose your own meal and hang out with me and some friends.

Maybe you can just turn up next time, choose your own meal and hang out with me and some friends.

😲 Where's the gentleman of you? This sounds like a permission to tag along and no way like an invitation to breakfast! 😱

Lol...Well, don't you know you have a standing invite? I'm happy to send one by carrier pigeon though.

Let's say that I am very private about other people's things, I think it's right after all. As for my personal things, I admit that I have no problem sharing them, obviously what concerns me personally, in the event that my wife is involved, for example, I go back to being confidential because I respect her privacy. This is my way of doing obviously then I think it's something very personal.
Nice post and nice ideas to reflectee, thanks for sharing!

Confidentiality is critical to me, as is the need to keep things private, especially in respect of people outside my immediate circle of trust. There are things people just don't need to know, especially people on social media. For me, that means Hive because I don't have any other social medias. We all do things differently I guess.

Well yes deep down it's also the beauty of the world eh eh, if we all did things the same it would be a bit boring, right? 😉
Anyway, don't get me wrong as I was saying, it wouldn't be a problem for me to talk about my things, but then I'm actually very reserved.

I hope your week is going well. Wednesday is starting for me here, only a few more days and it'll be the weekend again. All the best for the rest of the week.

Yes come on the working week started well, let's say I'm influencing myself but still I have to work anyway eh eh! Then as an optimist I always like to see the positive so... there are only 5 days left until my rest day!! 💪💪😉 I hope you too start the week well and continue even better!🤗

I had a complex start to the week, some rather difficult trucking and logistics situations, but I've picked up a couple new accounts I've been working on for six months so that makes for a good week. I'll be happy to see the weekend though. :)

I'm glad it was a good week! Then maybe I'll explain this account thing well, heh heh!

I think I am more private/wary of what I post on social media, but sometimes I think I am overthinking. After all, I am a nobody hahahaha!

Once information is out there it cannot be taken back...Best to show caution right?

Yup that's right! :)

Brought up in an age when you never spoke about politics, religion or private home life, a habit hard to break.

Will open up only if I feel people asked an honest question, I will give one back from experience, never hearsay, life is super tricky?

Breakfast looked excellent, good friends trust each other irrespective of age, we all need someone to bounce questions off of, in privacy 😉

I think some people misconstrued what I meant by sharing and privacy, but that's ok, whatever they think is fine.

But you speak truely and I agree.

Always a 50/50 call on how people read into anything. 😇Have an amazing day.

Hahahaa...this made my day day when I read the words girl person.
This means that you are a good friend and can be trusted with lots of things because she's comfortable sharing her issues with you.
In my case I also filter what I allow others to know about my private life.

Applying a filter to one's outbound information divulged to others is smart.

I think respect is very important in relationships. Give recpect and take recpect. You food looks very yummy. I like to eat this type of food. Sometime we need to meet friends and sharing our life with him.

Respect is very important, for ourselves, those immediately around us and for people in general, should they deserve it.

It seems, I am a very similar age to you (probably about 1 year younger) and I do feel there is a generational component to the willingness to share. I don't find it easy, I am a private person. I do feel I am quite strong with it and can deal with the problems life throws. I know though they say it is good to share.

A problem shared is a problem halved

Not sure I ever really agreed with this saying.

I was in a similar situation recently with someone who was 20 years younger than me who shared all her personal problems. She felt comfortable speaking to me. I think the key to being a good listener is not to just listen attentively but to listen empathetically. That is what most people want - just a bit of empathy for their situation. And that is what happened as I listened to this 30 year old. She felt relieved to have spoken to someone, I listened empathetically. However, there wasn't much I could really do to help - it just wasn't that type of problem. She felt better though.

I agree that sometimes burneds shared can make them lighter to carry, and that there's times when sharing things is valid and actually wise.

I guess my comments about over-sharing relates more to the way people splash their personal lives all over Facebook and other social medias, and divulge things about themselves, their lives, events and happenings, that really have no place being in the public domain. Of course, the same happens offline a lot.

But sure, sharing information between two friends or family members, between professional advisors like doctors, accountants, lawyers and such is legitimate usually.

There's a line people don't seem to know how to find, or care to find.

I do agree, you have reminded me now if someone else at work who does over share. They talk quite openly about things that really shouldn't be in public knowledge. One such instance involved her having a relationship with someone who was already married. The posts, pictures, made the whole thing public knowledge and was pretty uncomfortable for everyone else. No filter whatsoever.

In that case, the married party's partner found out, as the saw the messages. Destruction happened and you could say they deserved it but that not's my point, we all make decisions with consequences. It was the publicity of it that was shocking.

Yep, that's a classic over-share case. Bonkers really, the way people are so cavalier with their private information.

I used to try to share personal things on social media, but no one wants my thoughts. So I decided, and now I write in the mood, and it's always something positive. In fact, I don't share it, I just give it to the world... Whoever needs it, will take it for themselves!
!invest_vote

That's a novel way of approaching it, release the thoughts for people to make of them what they wish.

True! 💪
!CTP

Gotta love how she goes straight to the point with her first message, and then you with another quick and easy reply. From the looks of it, you sensed the urgency in her message.

Sadly nowadays people beat around bush too much, and then there's the bunch who can't take no for an answer. Being direct also seems like a crime, they end up thinking that you're rude haha. I wish people were more straight cut, would save us a lot more time.

I agree, getting to the point is the way to go right?

ALWAYS. Especially if you're an adult.

Beating around the bush might suit a child or a teenager more lol.

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Lol, exactly.

I usually keep my privacy away from many, however, there are situations that I do share because they present themselves as a GREAT opportunity to value my affections in warmth and treatment, work my spirit and fill it with hope, without a doubt I have the best examples to continue with this beautiful work of helping other people who want to be accompanied, heard and embraced.

Sometimes disclosing information is ok, sometimes not, it depends on the situation.

Totally agree Galen not everyone is prepared for X or Y conversation. On the highway, there are always different lanes. And it applies to everyone.

Nice breakfast.

And yeah it’s best to share things with people but knowing who and when to share is much more essential. Many people can’t keep secrets.

I am the private type and I don’t share things easily. But when it warrants sharing I would always do so without hesitation. I can also keep people private words.

I see people who are always spitting out peoples secret as people who we can’t tell our secret because the way they have spilled others words to us, same way they would spill ours to others..

I'm not must of a sharer to be honest. Information is power and I'm very careful with what I divulge for that reason.

That’s is the best we can do for ourselves and others. Thanks for sharing with us.

As we mature, we don't keep a lot of things to ourselves and we care less about what others think.

It's the opposite for me. As I matured I understood more and more the importance of privacy and the power other people can gain from having my information.

The translator modifies what I mean 😥.

True friends are very rare to find, and you are lucky to have one. I also have some friend whom i want to meet on the daily basis but life is busy and couldn't get time to do so, Hopefully one day all these excuses will be gone and we'll meet like the way we use to do in the past. Thanks for a beautiful post @galenkp

Yeah, I have one or two friends here and there, and feel I'm fortunate to have them.

Happy to hear that :) wish you a happy life.

You have proved to be a trustworthy to Trinity. That's why she was able to confide with you on her private matters. Continue to be always there for your girl

Well, she's not my girl, someone else is, but yeah for sure, Trinity is a good friend and feels able to confide in me; that's the result of years of being trustworthy and demonstrating the ability for secrecy and respect for other people's information.

I love sharing post about my life and personal experiences. Its the best for me. Nothing bad about it and I enjoy your posts because it's really not teaches life lessons.

Excellent, share everything.

Those real life experience posts have a lot to teach.

Yeah, this one questions the over-sharing of information and suggests that sharing too much is not a good thing. But it's personal choice.

Too much is too much but what exactly is too much? What has happened in one's daily life is a life lesson(s) for others and if such events conform to moral standard , share it but if those stuff has no value then it's too much to share.
#Weekendexperience

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