Forward motion and new horizons

in OCD28 days ago (edited)

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A good leader does not get bogged down in the minutia of a tactical problem at the expense of strategic success.

Jocko Willink


Hands up if you're a leader. [G-dog raises his hand confidently.]

It's who I am and even should I attempt to avoid it the fact I'm a leader comes through in my thoughts and actions no matter what. This doesn't mean I push people around because that's not what a good leader does; It does mean I work towards getting the best out of people in pursuit of a goal, empowering them to find hidden reserves, to want to take ownership and responsibility and to want to apply every shred of energy towards the attainment of success, no matter what the desired outcome might be.

But that sort of leadership is not what this post is about; I'm talking about leadership of oneself; taking ownership and action over one's own life and moving it forward.

I'm going to ask again...Hands up if you're a leader.

I hope all of you have your hand up because all of you are leaders... But...How so G-dog? Well in life we lead ourselves; We're in command of our own lives and it's that form of leadership we need to be the best at because...Well, because our lives depend on it.

I made a decision to leave my job and finished up a couple weeks ago and whilst some have indicated to me it's a risky move I don't believe so. To me what was risky was staying in a place that provided no value to me other than a few dollars to pay the bills. Throw moments of my life away so cheaply? I think not. So I left and am unemployed.

I haven't spent much time looking for jobs; yes I've taken a look and have spoken to some people but for me this process is more about going through the steps to understand myself a little more, learn some things that will help me make some valuable and confident forward motion in the future. I'll work again, but right now I'm working on simply leading my life, living my life; it's what I need to be doing right now. So...Yeah, I'm in a leadership role for sure. The leadership of myself. I take that very seriously indeed because I only have one.

Our good friend Jocko Willink says, leadership requires finding the equilibrium in the dichotomy of many seemingly contradictory qualities, between one extreme and another.

Equilibrium in the difference of contradictory qualities; I can't argue with that. Could equilibrium also mean balance? I think so and it's the need for balance that led me to resign my job and find more time for myself.

Within each of us is contradiction, extremes of thought and emotion and I've certainly felt a few of those in the six weeks since I handed my notice period at work and subsequently ended up.

Have I felt doubt? Yes. Has there been deep happiness and contentment? Of course. Have I swung between confidence and fear of the unknown? For sure...But I've also found a central point. Through it all has been the ability to lead myself, to be a good leader in my own life and that's what has guided me towards the right attitudes, mindset and action, the motion that will be required to find the best solutions and resolutions.

I have no idea what's going to come of me, where my career path may lead or what new horizons may present themselves. What I know is that I'm doing this for the right reasons, my life reasons, and I feel confident in my ability to lead, or guide, myself to the right outcomes.

Have you folks ever embarked on a journey of discovery, sought a shift in life, location, career, relationships or just sought to be a happier healthier version of yourself? Please feel free to tell me about it below.


Design and create your ideal life, don't live it by default - Tomorrow isn't promised so be humble and kind

Discord: galenkp#9209

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I'm way too watery to be a leader XD

To me what was risky was staying in a place that provided no value to me other than a few dollars to pay the bills. Throw moments of my life away so cheaply?

I completely agree with this. The cruisiness is probably a nice change of pace right now? :)

You lead yourself every time you make a decision that affects you. Don't tell me you don't make any either; I will not believe you.

I am. I left my job 21 years ago. Never looked back.


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Yeah, I've heard so many say the same. It's unlikely I'll be able to not work but I'll be picky.

Project Management / Consulting you can earn $100,000 working a few months each year. Add Project Management to your LinkedIn profile... just had a Head Hunter offer me $700 a day ... can you write a Project Plan, Scope of Work, Risk Management Plan, Terms of Reference, RFP, Project Schedule , RFS etc .... Big $$$$ for very short term contracts


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That's where it's at. In a pre-covid world that's what I'd be doing I guess as I have the skills. It's an unusual landscape right now though, here at least. Something will eventuate though. I may even get a lemonade stand going come summer.

Governments are re designing all their building for pandemic social distancing ... tons of work


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Loads of opportunities around for sure.

Hey, @galenkp
I meant to comment on a previous post of yours about your health issues and then something came up, and many posts later I see this.
What can I say? Been there, done that. I did it without the sense of confidence you have, so I'm sure you do great someplace else.
I had a student once who, after becoming a teacher became a doctor (some sort of new wave medicine thing). He went as far as affirming that most diseases people have these days were caused by their jobs (from a flu to cancer).
Most of his patients got better after they followed his first instruction: leave your job.
Not sure how much truth there is in that, but it works for most people I know under regular circumstances (a normal country where meritocracy works and the economy does not depend on a paternalistic autocrat).

Wish you the best. First things first, hope your health improves. I'm sure you'll find your niche and do better than before.
Have a great day!

Hey Henrry, nice to see you around and thanks for your great comment. I admit to feeling very good about resigning and whilst I'll have to work at some stage that's not just yet. I literally just posted about it 5 minutes ago. I'm happy to see what happens over time and in the meantime find a few moments for myself. It's been a good step.

I hope you and the family are well.

Bee raises her hand pretty confidently as well.

I read that you left your job, but at the time I was too swamped to 'hive'. I'm glad you did what you did by taking your life into your own hands. It always makes me happy when people take this difficult step, and even happier when it all works out. I have no doubt that in your case it will. It already does, right?

Yup, I've done that a few times in my life. It usually went along with physically moving, but in all cases, the decision was mine and with one exception (you know which one😍) all of them happened because I outgrew the job I was doing. At 23 or so I moved away from my hometown for work, at 28 moved to Australia, and at 31 to the US. From there back to Germany for a bit before moving to Switzerland when 34, and back to Germany again before ending up here in the US for the past 10 years.

Finding joy and fulfillment in my work has been at the forefront of my life for the longest time. These days I'd like to put the emphasis on my activities outside of my job, however, when you're responsible for not only yourself it makes it a bit harder. Thankfully I am still enjoying my work, despite being stressful as heck at times, so for the moment I'll keep on trying

finding the equilibrium in the dichotomy of many seemingly contradictory qualities, between one extreme and another

or in other, and your words - finding the balance between what I have to do and what I want to do while enjoying the journey.

p.s. sorry for the wall of text

You're a good example of someone who has taken stock then taken action. Has it been difficult at times? I'm sure it has, emotionally or even just logistically, but here you are extolling the virtues after many years of making your life happen the way you want it to be.

So many feel trapped in their situation or simply don't do the work to evaluate it. Some are too attached to material things or simply lack the courage to act. Whatever it is, many will accept their lot in life as it's easy to do so. Some take action though and whilst it's not always easy, it always causes change. That's not a bad thing.

Balance between what we have to do and what we want to do

Yes, exactly. And in some, design and create ethos and all of a sudden things are feeling pretty good.

Great comment, thanks!

Has it been difficult at times? I'm sure it has, emotionally or even just logistically...

For sure. All of that and also financially, because I didn't necessarily move to a better-paid position, but had to start in a different country. But it was all worth it and I would do it again, maybe even a little earlier in life.

Good things sometimes start off feeling uncomfortable right?

Indeed they do. Experience talking here I can hear it and know it myself :)

right now I'm working on simply leading my life, living my life; it's what I need to be doing right now.

Exactly, there are times in life, when we need to take steps to do things, that will make us happy - they may be small things for others, but the price of inner peace and happiness is so much. I have moved to my native to stay with my parents leaving my wife and kids at one other place as they cannot move now because of kid's education. But I feel I should be with my parents and spend some quit moments and play football, roam with friends, visit places....

Understanding where we need to be at any given point is quite important, I mean where we need to be physically or emotionally here. So many people fail to understand themselves and fail to plan then execute the plan. And so they stay in place, often unhappy and not able to move forward.

Sometimes, its good to look back and restrategise our life.

A lot of us don't do this but if not people embark on the journey of discovering themselves, we will have a lot of happier people.

I like the way you are living in your terms at this point. It takes courage and determination.

I pray you find yourself

Living life on our terms is a little more difficult with the pandemic but I work towards it as well as I can. The alternative, living life by default, isn't very appealing.

Thanks for commenting.

living life by default, isn't very appealing.

Totally true

First, I applaud you for making the decision to seize control of your life. We've been conditioned in this modern day society to think employment is the only option but when you have the strength to remove yourself from the plethora of limitations of that employee mindset driven existence a whole new world opens up.

I was a wage slave for almost thirty years. I was raised to work hard, go above and beyond, and do whatever was asked of me of my "superiors". You know what? That only got me labeled as a "work horse" in most jobs I had and my "reward" was only more work. It seemed like no matter how hard I worked I barely made enough to have anything left over at the end of the month after the bills were paid and I socked away 12% of my income into my 401k like I was told to by financial analysts.

I had been writing on the side for over twenty years and finally made the decision to leave my day job in 2017. I was scared as hell and nearly chickened out several times. I went through what only could be described as healing/deprogramming in the weeks/months that followed. Eventually little things began to change, suddenly the success I had been chasing for over two decades began to seek me out instead. Four years later I'm doing better than ever. My net worth is easily 10x what it was when I was an employee. I don't say that to brag but it feels like I had to prove how seriously I wanted to be a writer to the universe. Once I did this it set a mechanism in place to deliver abundance. Businesses say they can't find employees because people "don't want to work" but what is actually happening is the pandemic made people wake up enmasse. More people than ever are building their own businesses and finding their own way.

Stats say that most millionaires have seven different income streams. My advice to you is to get started building this for yourself. I read a book called "Choose Yourself" years before I quit that gave me practical advice on how to begin. Nomad Capitalist and MyRichJourney on YouTube have also been immensely helpful. The key is to get your money working for you instead of vice versa. So much of what we've been taught in the public school system and by so-called mainstream financial analysts about debt and investing is wrong. What they teach us keeps us poor. I'll say it again because it's so important...what they teach us keeps us poor and it'll become more and more apparent as you move forward in your emancipation.

You just have to step outside the mindset that you've been conditioned to believe and start thinking like the wealthy do. You will eventually lose some of your friends from your "old life" as you begin to transform. Surround yourself with a few people who have already achieved what you want and that you genuinely like, respect, and click with. It's amazing to be on the other side. You actually have time to devote to your own self-improvement and health. You have time and the mind-space to pay attention to be truly present for your family and friends. Sorry, I nearly wrote a book here! Lol.

Best of luck to you man! I'm rooting for you.

You make some good points and it's good to see someone else acknowledge that the system isn't geared towards financial freedom, or even security, in the least bit. Doing what we're told/taught through school and society is simply going to keep us on the hamster wheel and that's why I needed to forge a new path. I've made some good decisions in the past and that's allowed me to have a few options.

You also mention losing friends and surrounding oneself with the right influencers. (I don't mean Instagram influencers here). This is an important factor as those who have been there and done that can provide valuable information or just an example to aim at. I remember when I first started in the property industry twenty years ago. There were so many naysayers around me but they dropped away as success came. They couldn't handle my success and forward progression and jealousy, envy and their feelings of self-doubt pulled them away. I was ok with it.

Anyway, thanks for taking the time to write your comment and for opening up about your personal journey. This process has been a long time coming and, as you say, the pandemic situation has caused many to reevaluate, myself included.

More people are waking up to the perils of legacy finance, cryptocurrency has been a huge catalyst for this. It's been interesting to watch the news lately. The SEC is in a really tight spot here in the U.S. (it's probably the same across the globe). They don't want a whole new class of people to become wealthy or else their entire system of control falls apart but crypto has now infiltrated the legacy financial system in the form of hedge funds and investments from big corporations (mostly in the form of Bitcoin). The genie is truly out of the bottle. They're realizing it's too late to kill crypto outright since the big banks and corporations are in deep and they our among the governments largest constituents. They're racing to figure out the solution. I think they're gunning for defi first since this is how most people are making the big money in this cycle. They'll say it will be "to keep people safe".

It sounds like you've already experienced the shift that success brings so you'll navigate this new journey just fine.

Thanks and I'm happy you've decided to take this particular path. In ten years from now you'll look back and realize all the dividends it paid.

Within each of us is contradiction, extremes of thought and emotion

Is this ever true. Wonderful post. So glad I saw it. I wish you the very best as you write the next chapter of your life. May it bring you joy, prosperity, and continuous satisfaction.

Life as always seemed too short to waste as a wage slave but there's always been a reason not to move forward into other realities. I'm going to have to work again at some stage but for now prosperity is taking different meaning and I'm seeking a situation in which continual satisfaction is sustainable. I'll enjoy the ride.

Thanks for reading and commenting, I greatly appreciate it.

Absolutely! Wealth is so much more than money. And I bet there's a huge satisfaction to taking this next step to be true to yourself.

A deep satisfaction, and from the moment I handed in four weeks notice I felt better. More in control of my life. I felt, right away, my design and create my ideal life, don't live it by default, ethos was better deployed and that I was embracing it more confidently. It's been a good move.

Right there with you, and if you were where I was mentally, I'm hoping that cloud has started to lift for you as well. It was just last week Liza thought she could sense that the "cloud" was slowing lifting away. It feels great; I'm still anxious, but at this point have zero regrets.

I think you made the right choice too, btw; only one life to live!

So great that she sees some improvement in you and that's always a good sign. The fairer gender tend to have an intuition for these things. I hope the new gig is going well.

That is how my Steem/Hive journey started. I quit my office job that was making me depressed and lead to me having anxiety attacks almost daily. I decided that I needed change in my life. For a longest time I waited for someone to swoop in and lead me out of the darkness, then I realized that no one was coming and that someone should be myself. So yea, I am a leader and I don't regret embarking that journey. It has given me so much and I am grateful for every moment of it.

There have been also other times in my life where I have felt that I need to step away from certain situations in order to be more healthy individual. To focus more on myself and what I want from my life. It came from realizing that me being in those situations did no one a service as I was not equipped to handle them.

Yep, a natural born leader of your own life. I dig it M!

I think sometimes it's so difficult for people to see that they are truly in control and that one has to lead oneself to better decisions and outcomes. Think of a person in an abusive relationship for instance; only the person can take the steps. They have to want to. Same with a work scenario like yours or mine.

You're someone who listens to oneself, looks internally, and seeks answers through asking the right questions. Happier? I bet you are!

Thanks for your great comment M. All the best for the day.

There are good days and there are bad days of course. But only we ourselves can will it, no one else can for us nor they should.

I am a lot better than before in some ways, but that is always work in progress. A lot of work to be done before I can say that I am best version that I can be.

I hope you have an awesome day too Galen!

I don't think I'll ever be my best version. Too broken you see. But there's better versions than before sometimes and that's a good thing to aim for I think.

All the best for the run into the weekend. ☺️

Good leadership requires more effort to achieving greatness. Sometimes you have to surrender your all and pretend it is all cool knowing very well things hurt. Especially if that's all it takes to make things right. I made a great moment when l led a group last year. Thanks for reminding me of this sir. You are an inspiration.

Hi there McSamm, thanks for your comment.

pretend it is all cool knowing very well things hurt

I sort of agree here, but I don't pretend things hurt. I know they do, have in the past and that they will in the future also. It's those hurts, the failures, that help determine the way forward though and so I embrace that pain, hurt, failure, disappointment...Whatever we call it that's one certain way of learning what not to do which, of course, leads us into what to do. It's then up to us to deploy. To take action.

I put my hand up!! Both times. Some might suggest that I put my hand up for everything though...

It's good you did both times Boomy, it means you know what's up.

Your hand.

Both hands!!! ;OD

Lol...Oh yeah, I didn't think of that. I didn't tell people to drop their hand the first time. So...Both hands up.

My bad.

I was just glad that you didnt ask for a third time. I would have been goosed.

Lol...There's a third time option you just have to be willing and able to get it up.

HAhahahahhahahahahhahah!!!!!

You are looking so handsome Mr galenkp😍
Stay blessed stay happy stay support us,❤️😁

Stop it, you're making me blush. 😊

Stay always happy :)

Yes. Yes and yes. I have moved 23 times in almost 27 years, mostly for work, sometimes for change, and once for fun.

All kidding aside, Every day is part of the journey called me. The location changes, but, the job remains much the same. I find that I can find the right balance by giving myself some time to be me and working without being a slave to the job. I'm ready to walk away from work, I have done my time, filled my nest, and put some away for the olden days.

I feel safe. I feel secure. I love life and I love myself. Therefore, I am doing this for myself and for my family. There is so much work out there, so much contracting/consulting. I don't have to work this hard. I can work selectively or not at all.

Just do it. That is what I tell myself.

Good luck to you! I know you will be amazing, no matter what you do.

I think it's good to have change in life, it keeps things interesting and whilst it can be difficult at times it's also beneficial; even the difficult times though we may not see that at the time.

You've moved around a lot so I think you get what I'm saying.

It is one of the reasons I admire you walking away from a toxic job. When you are done healing thyself, I hope you lean towards something that will offer more balance and time off to do something for yourself. I need to go back and read about the garden. I see a post just begging me to come.

Can I buy more time from you? :( Mine is used up before I start my day.

Balance is what I'll be seeking. I don't know what it looks like but I think I'll know it when I see it.

I'll sell you some time. Let's hit the negotiating table and see what we can come up with.

You are on!

Warning..!

I have a feeling you are very driven like I am. Beware that you may end up working harder in your off time.

I know that is my situation...

10 am, earlier today.

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Staying home can be a tough gig...

You look good with a mask on.

And I was thinking how handsome you looked in that photo...

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Lol.

That guy is hilarious. Have you seen his stand up show?

Yes, Dr. Ken is it.?

He is funny on the masked singer tv show also.

And You are a good looking fella...

Or is that a mask.?

I always wear a mask.

I just finally made the official jump last week and handed in my notice. It was bittersweet for sure and I will miss the people I work with but something happened today that made me realize I made the right choice. We had our department wide staff meeting and you know what our executive didn’t mention at all? My departure. I’ve worked with these people for four years, busted my ass and taken on the work of 2.5-3 people but I couldn’t even get a farewell, best of luck? Yeah, that’s a fantastic way to show that I didn’t really matter in the end.

Siena is quite stressed about it all but I’m trying to be positive about it and from the random people that have approached me saying they “heard the news” and they will miss me, I know that I can make my way. The new company I’m working for is great, I’m just hoping that I can keep a good work life balance through it all.

Well done mate! What happened, or more to the point what didn't happen in that meeting is typical behaviour these days. It doesn't negate what you did and you know what that is so take it away knowing you fucken kicked ass bro!

All the best with the new gig brah, just be you and it'll all work out.

Well good on you for taking that step, could not have been an easy decision @galenkp but you're a smart man, I'm sure a new path will open up OR you'll make that pathway yourself!
I was forced to leave my job when I reached a certain age but turned our garden cottage into an Airbnb about 6 months prior to retirement to supplement our corporate pensions. It worked out better than I ever dreamed of, we actually had to expand and cut one wing of our home off and turned it into a studio apartment so are now kept very busy indeed.
A hard lesson I'm currently learning is taking leadership of my health as I'm experiencing some scary issues, but that's a totally different but likely more important thing to take charge of!
Enjoy the freedom, I look forward to reading where your new path will be leading you.

I think it's great that some can take advantage of B&B or AirBnB opportunities with their homes and in your case it seems to be working well; I hope that continues.

My situation wasn't a simple decision and some care was taken of course. I'll make it work for me and am sure I'll get back to doing something eventually. Time will tell. Right at the minute I'm enjoying a little break.

I knew you had some health issues but don't know what. I hope a resolution is found quickly and you're on the mend.

I can relate - because I just live one day at a time and trust God to guide me. I know I'm in control of my own life.

From someone who works so hard at making things happen this comment says a lot. ✅

I hope you're well and have a great Sunday when it arrives for you. 🙃