As much as I have a love and hate relationship with my mom’s house, I find that I tend to spend more time over there than I should. Putting my family saga aside, everything is nice. I get to hear birds chirping, waking up to a beautiful sunrise, and at night, I get to take photos of the moon as much as I can with a very clear view from the balcony. Aside from those, the beach and the mountain are only 3 hours drive and the closest airport that would take me anywhere is only an hour drive. In comparison to my own place, the closest airport was 2 hours drive and it only has limited places to go. In fact last year, I flew more from the airport near my home because even Bali is only 2 hours away by flight and if I want to go overseas, there are more direct flights and more destinations that I wanted. But a part of me can’t still let go of my own safe haven. This is the part that is difficult. Will I eventually let go of my life in another place or should I move back in with my mom?
I can see how moving back will help a lot especially with my mom now focusing on the bakery. I can also focus on that instead of having to travel once in a while. I can travel a lot more as there are many parts of the east that are still hidden and that I haven’t showcased the beauty of them here. But I keep wondering if they would be better for me in terms of my mental health. As of now, I am already barely surviving. It can be suffocating at times to live with them despite that we don’t really interact much except when I am away from my laptop and helping my mom out for now. I don’t think the last time I went home it ended up on a good note. It never ended on a good note that I vowed to never go back home but because the cat, here I am. I am home again. And that cycle is on repeat.
With the rising cost of things, I find that living with my mom is helping me ease my expenses by 80%. Having her around also helps me save time on some things like chores and food. It’s been something I consider because I want to save up more again and the only way I can save up is to live with my mom as I don’t have to double spend on food. By me being present, I can actually show her how to make potential new menus that we could introduce. So far, from my bread-making, pretzel is what caught our attention the most as it’s good, easy to make and visually appetizing. We’re hoping to introduce it soon.
Although living with my mom, the weather in the east can be crazy. It’s bipolar as it gets. Sometimes it can be 90F and there are times when it’s actually pleasant. So, to survive around here you either have to have an air-conditioner or double fan that constantly blows to ease you from feeling baked alive. It’s one of the reasons why I am still hesitant to move in with my mom. So, I still have to weigh the decision carefully as it can be a major decision that I will be making in my life for now.
 | 𝘔𝘢𝘤 𝘪𝘴 𝘢 𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧-𝘦𝘮𝘱𝘭𝘰𝘺𝘦𝘥 𝘯𝘪𝘯𝘫𝘢 & 𝘤𝘰𝘧𝘧𝘦𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘯𝘰𝘪𝘴𝘴𝘦𝘶𝘳 . 𝘈 𝘵𝘺𝘱𝘪𝘤𝘢𝘭 𝘪𝘯𝘵𝘳𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘵 𝘪𝘯 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦 𝘸𝘪𝘵𝘩 𝘭𝘪𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘢𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦, 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘴, 𝘵𝘦𝘤𝘩𝘯𝘰𝘭𝘰𝘨𝘺 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘩𝘪𝘭𝘰𝘴𝘰𝘱𝘩𝘺. 𝘛𝘩𝘪𝘴 𝘪𝘴 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘨, 𝘢 𝘳𝘦𝘧𝘭𝘦𝘤𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯 𝘰𝘧 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘸𝘢𝘯𝘥𝘦𝘳𝘭𝘶𝘴𝘵 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘩𝘪𝘳𝘴𝘵 𝘧𝘰𝘳 𝘬𝘯𝘰𝘸𝘭𝘦𝘥𝘨𝘦. 𝘚𝘩𝘦 𝘰𝘧𝘵𝘦𝘯 𝘤𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘣𝘰𝘰𝘬𝘴, 𝘮𝘰𝘷𝘪𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘴𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘴 𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘪𝘦𝘸𝘴, 𝘵𝘦𝘤𝘩 𝘳𝘦𝘷𝘪𝘦𝘸𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘳𝘦𝘯𝘥𝘴, 𝘱𝘩𝘰𝘵𝘰𝘨𝘳𝘢𝘱𝘩𝘺, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘥𝘦𝘷𝘦𝘭𝘰𝘱𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵. 𝘖𝘯𝘤𝘦 𝘪𝘯 𝘢 𝘣𝘭𝘶𝘦 𝘮𝘰𝘰𝘯, 𝘺𝘰𝘶 𝘤𝘢𝘯 𝘧𝘪𝘯𝘥 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘷𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘨, 𝘪𝘮𝘮𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘩𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘦𝘭𝘧 𝘪𝘯 𝘭𝘰𝘤𝘢𝘭 𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘳𝘢𝘥𝘪𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘴, 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘵𝘢𝘬𝘪𝘯𝘨 𝘱𝘪𝘤𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘴 𝘰𝘧 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘣𝘦𝘢𝘶𝘵𝘪𝘧𝘶𝘭 𝘴𝘪𝘨𝘩𝘵𝘴 𝘴𝘩𝘦 𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘰𝘶𝘯𝘵𝘦𝘳𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘸𝘢𝘺. 𝘚𝘩𝘦'𝘴 𝘢𝘯 𝘰𝘤𝘤𝘢𝘴𝘪𝘰𝘯𝘢𝘭 𝘧𝘰𝘰𝘥𝘪𝘦 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘭𝘰𝘷𝘦𝘴 𝘵𝘰 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘭𝘰𝘳𝘦 𝘯𝘦𝘸 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘥𝘦𝘭𝘪𝘤𝘪𝘰𝘶𝘴 𝘤𝘶𝘭𝘪𝘯𝘢𝘳𝘺 𝘦𝘹𝘱𝘦𝘳𝘪𝘦𝘯𝘤𝘦𝘴. 𝘍𝘰𝘭𝘭𝘰𝘸 𝘢𝘭𝘰𝘯𝘨 𝘰𝘯 𝘩𝘦𝘳 𝘢𝘥𝘷𝘦𝘯𝘵𝘶𝘳𝘦𝘴 𝘢𝘯𝘥 𝘫𝘰𝘪𝘯 𝘵𝘩𝘦 𝘤𝘰𝘯𝘷𝘦𝘳𝘴𝘢𝘵𝘪𝘰𝘯! 𝘋𝘰𝘯'𝘵 𝘩𝘦𝘴𝘪𝘵𝘢𝘵𝘦 𝘵𝘰 𝘶𝘱𝘷𝘰𝘵𝘦, 𝘭𝘦𝘢𝘷𝘦 𝘢 𝘤𝘰𝘮𝘮𝘦𝘯𝘵 𝘰𝘳 𝘢 𝘧𝘦𝘦𝘥𝘣𝘢𝘤𝘬. 𝘈 𝘳𝘦-𝘣𝘭𝘰𝘨 𝘪𝘴 𝘢𝘭𝘴𝘰 𝘢𝘱𝘱𝘳𝘦𝘤𝘪𝘢𝘵𝘦𝘥 𝘵𝘰𝘰. |
I suddenly missed the times when I lived in my aunt's place, they have a bakery, and waking up in the morning the first aroma I can smell is the freshly baked bread. Me too I easily missed my mother, even though I am not in a good condition with my old man, still, I missed the mother's presence, LOL.
I know right, it's always the smell that gets me up in the morning ever since we started it. Are you living alone and not with your parents?
Opposite to when I was still living with my parents.. Way far from the city and transportation was a hassle. Above all, I do chores more than others lol .
More than a year from now, I'll be living with them again. Gonna be hard again lol.
Will it? I don't think it will be hard because they must have missed you a lot. Don't be surprised you will eventually get tired of being over pampered when you get home.
Haha. I hope so. But when I'm at home, I can't keep myself doing the chores because most are boys and I don't like seeing my mother doing them, so yes it's tiring 😂
I know it can be tough but have you discussed the challenges that you might have with them? I did with mine and the biggest issue for me would be privacy. So, if i were to move back with them, I'd have my own workspace and everything. It's what will be challenging because by default, I don't like too much face-to-face interaction.
About the heat, you can get solar to power fans in the house so they can blow all day.
Many of us grow to a stage that requires us to own our space and when we don't, we naturally don't tolerate something that results in an argument, disagreement, and others.
Staying with mom is fun for me, I get to do chores though because I love to cook but having her around really makes me feel good
It's quite tolerable for now but we're working on AC installation that will help when we're inside. It's not comfortable working while under the heat. Also yeah, having my mom around is great just like how you'd probably feel when you have your mom around.
The AC installation will definitely go a long way for you guys and it's true that working in a hot environment is not always cool, it reduces the level of productivity.
I think living with my parents still saves me a lot. I am taking this opportunity to learn how to handle and manage things, especially budgeting.
Geez. I have been feeling sick since yesterday due to the unpredictable weather. Morning will be so cold, lunchtime would be scorching hot until the afternoon, then evening would go back to giving cold breeze.
tell me all about it! my grandma is currently sick due to unpredictable weather and I am sort of scared of other family members getting it too. But these past a few days have been good at least.
It's most of the time a difficult process and/or decision to move back in with your parents, especially when you're used to having your own household. It's easier said than done but setting boundaries and making compromises could make the transition easier. Of course all party's should be content with the promises and also keep to those.
Goodluck with whatever you eventually choose to do.
For sure, the boundaries is something I am still settling with other family members. I have to do a bit of renovation so that it just fits the way I used to live. Thank you for all these, much appreciated and I look forward reading your blog again! your recent trips have been interesting to read :D
If it's not too personal, would like to read about the process here 😊. I enjoy watching or reading about renovation projects.
Thank you and so are yours 😊.
Wow ,its great that your mom.is having a bakery business,that really I wanted to have to but it needed a huge capital and ofcourse I need to study first on baking.
I really love bread ,every time I went to the town I always buy some bread🥰
We didn't start with a huge capital. It was a simple word of mouth marketing at first and pre-order system. But from there we have scaled quite a bit and now, my mom has resigned from another job and we have more time for doing it. So, maybe you can start small and scale hehe although I can tell you as much, it's not gonna be an easy ride.
It is normal to feel that you miss living with your mother and especially if you did it for a large part of your life.
We feel safe in that refuge of our parents' home and we can even relax.
but part of growing in life is knowing how to leave the nest and take our own paths, open paths for our future generations.
That's kinda true. It may take a bit of time for me to adjust but now, I am actually pretty well-adjusted and finds my routine back. Thanks for this. I've been bit preoccupied!
I see that returning to your mother's house seems to be a disadvantage for you. You can evaluate this. 😊
Having your mom around sounds like a double edged sword in a few regards. There’s a lot of benefits but there’s also a lot of challenges and risks to you. I think staying for a bit but having an exit option sounds like it might be best for you at the moment. That’s not always a bad thing! You do have to take care of yourself mentally as well though, so if you’re feeling stifled perhaps go away for a little bit and come back.