Regarding people who seem to be wiser, wittier and more convincing than others: are they really closer to "the truth", or is it just the case that they just happen to be louder than the rest? Or maybe they have an unrelated personal trait that makes people listen to them more readily, regardless of the validity of their thoughts?
Maybe these people just happen to have some personal charisma. Maybe it's the tone of their voice, or maybe it's their body language. It almost surely has to do with seeing the person talk. I guess they display a strong belief in what they are saying by looking very decisive.
Yes, decisiveness in the way you present yourself is clearly the key to getting heard. Confidence is, of course, strongly related to decisiveness.
I experience people who are loud and often talk mostly as people who do not listen and thus they have only one view...their own... And since they only have one view, they can also present it with great decisiveness.
If you have many perspectives, you automatically become quieter, because you have much to think about 🤔
I agree with you. And I will add that I often find myself having a view that's more informed or beneficial to the situation, but I miss the tools to express it, leaving me stuck with my own silent disagreement in a less-than-optimal situation. The challenge is, then, to voice my opinion in a convincing manner.
To avoid misunderstanding, this is not about who wins an argument. After I offer my view and the other party accepts it as superior, I wouldn't mind someone else further challenging it.
It's about creating a process where the we keep improving together and respect each other along the way.
I totally understand you :) - I have always the same 'problem' of expressing my thoughts in a convincing manner. I am mostly overruled by the loud people - that's why i stay quiet and then later I am disappointed that I could not express my point of view clearly. I really love good conversations but i understood that i'm not made to discuss with a lot of people. It works for me with one or two persons in a quiet manner where everybody is listening to what the others want to say. Then there is a process of improving each other with respect.