9 MAY 2024
Man, my back is in rough shape this morning! I think it's probably a good thing though. I'm thinking it's not spinal pain, but probably muscles that weren't used to working...
The past three days I've been doing the following:
10x pull-ups (1 set)
20x weighted squats (2 sets)
3x 3 minute rounds with heavy bag
45 seconds of dead hang between each 3 minute round
...and I think the dead hangs are forcing my back to workout some issues.
So right now it's uncomfortable, but I'm pretty sure this is a good discomfort. I'm very excited to continue, and to see how my new short routine can evolve and grow with my abilities. I was kind of surprised when I started this 3 days ago - I shouldn't have been, because even just a few weeks ago I told my wife:
"I'm pretty sure I can still roll up to a bar and do 10 pull-ups,"
but when the time came to prove it, I doubted whether or not I'd be able to give 10 clean ones - after all, it'd been years since I even did one single pull-up.
I was relieved and pleased to get all 10 on the first day, and even on the second day. By the third day (yesterday), I was too sore, so I just did squats, heavy bag and dead hangs. Each time I went to hang I could feel my back and body stretching out under its own weight. I tried letting my grip slide out gradually over each 45s hang - hoping to strengthen my fingers by allowing myself to rely solely on the last one or two knuckles to hold my bodyweight. All in all, it's been going well. Even though I'm just getting started, I'm happy to see my intentions manifesting in my choices like this.
I CHERISH HOW HEALTHY I AM, AND HOW GREAT I FEEL. I LOVE HOW I LOOK IN THE MIRROR: PERFECT BODY WEIGHT, LEAN AND STRONG. I FEEL POWERFUL AS I PLAY THE YIDAKI FOR LONG PERIODS WITH COMFORT AND EASE, AND AS I CONFIDENTLY OVERCOME PHYSICAL CHALLENGES. I AM GRATEFUL FOR THE ENDORPHIN RELEASE THAT MAKES MY THINKING CLEARER AND BRIGHTER. I FULLY RECEIVE THE EXTRA OXYGEN INTAKE AS IT PURIFIES MY BLOOD AND ORGANS. I LOVE HOW I FEEL: POWERFUL, STRONG, CLEAR AND VIBRANT…READY TO EMBRACE LIVE TO THE FULLEST.
I will need to cut out this stupid vape shit to help with the breathing/yidaki portion of this particular intention - which I plan to do in two weeks, after my annual camping trip.
I had some luck with a crow this morning, although I need to remember to start bringing the peanuts with me to work.
I've been planning on making friends with crows in my back yard, but they don't really come around very often out there. Where I work in the city though, they do seem to show up daily, so I'm thinking this might be the best place to start making a connection with them...but it all starts with remembering the peanuts 😛
The crow I met with this morning was watching over our parking lot. I saw him and gave my best crow call, and as he responded back to me over the course of several call cycles, I observed how the tone and duration of his call was changing, and tried my best to modulate along with him. Hopefully this will have caught his interest enough to cause him to come back tomorrow, and hopefully I can remember to bring the nuts tomorrow. I think I will put them right on top of my car, and maybe eventually even leave the windows open and put peanuts on the seat.
I haven't worked out all the details yet - as you can see it's a plan still very much in flux - but I feel convinced at this point that I will have better luck trying to meet crows out here, and maybe I can get them to follow me home someday and learn where I live. I don't want to keep them, I'd just like to have them stop by once in a while and chat. Ultimately, I think it would be so cool if I could summon a murder of crows with my flute - so I guess that's the goal!
Other than all that, I still need to work on integrating reality checks throughout my day.
I have had some luck with the "hand check" method over the years, but have never been consistent enough to create a solid pattern. On a few seemingly random occasions, I was fortunate enough to find myself checking my hands within a dream and further, was able to recognize that my hands were not my hands, and that I was in a dream. But in most cases, the sheer excitement of realizing I was lucid in a dream was enough to wake me up. Of all my goals and intentions, lucid dreaming currently seems to be the most out of reach - but believing in failure doesn't lead to success, so I choose to believe that it is within reach...only a matter of putting in the effort and staying conscious of my intentions.
Well, I suppose that's what was on my mind this morning. Journaling feels a little strange when it's broadcasted like this - like it's probably normal for a journal to be a general free write, right? Probably also normal for it to jump around and have little to no cohesion and no real/definite purpose too, right? I have no idea, but when it's posted, it does feel like I should be doing more/better - but I am just reminding myself that this is valid too.
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