[Part 1] My Own Experience: Depression; Symptoms 1 and 2.抑郁症！！

Today I will be writing about an issue that is not commonly discussed and it is also a sensitive issue but this issue is also widespread. Most importantly, it is close to heart. Very close heart. This issue is, depression.
kristylkho 今天要告诉大家是自己曾经历过的抑郁症经验之谈！抑郁症在很多人的眼里和想法是一种的精神病。尤其是亚洲人会比较不太了解什么是抑郁症！

There are a few types of depressions but the most common depression is Major Depression. The symptoms include:

1. Feeling worthless or guilty;
2. Loss of interest or pleasure in activities that you usually enjoy;
3. Weight gain or weight loss;
4. Insomnia;
5. Feeling restless or agitated both physically and mentally;
6. Being tired most of the time;
7. Having trouble making decisions or concentrating;
8. Having suicidal thoughts.
   抑郁症有很多种，比较常见到的是严重性抑郁症！症状是；
   1） 觉得自己很没有价值和罪恶感。
   2）对自己喜欢的活动感到没兴趣和无趣。
   3）体重会忽然间减轻或是增加。
   4）失眠。
   5）身理和心理会感觉到不安和激动。
   6）总觉得自己很累。
   7）拿不定主意和精神很沮丧。
   8）总觉得生活没有意义想要了结生命。

The feelings that are stated above are what I felt when i was battling depression in my teenage years. I wasnt a normal teenager, hanging out with friends in the mall, gossiping with friends or go on a shopping spree. I wasnt even focused on my study. I cared about nothing because i was numb emotionally. But for a person to have depressions, it is usually because they have been scarred or taken for granted. As for me, I was scarred. Not by my parents, of course, but by the adults that i grew up with.
这些症状的出现是在我少年的时期，少年时期的我并不像普通一般的少年们一样！对于功课我不能集中精神，对很多的事情我都提不起劲。会患上抑郁症的人通常都是被伤害过的！我自己不是被我的父母亲伤害，而是被我身边的长辈和亲人伤害的。

When i was young, I was a happy kid. I was carefree, naive, adored by teachers. My parents brought me up well-mannered, respectful and confident. But everything started to crumble when I was in my teens. I was only a teen when people closed to me started criticizing me to extreme level. I was insulted, judged, scolded and even shut out by them. I guess that's where the "feeling worthless and guilty" part came in. I felt worthless because i feel like cant do anything worth while and because of the worthless feeling i had, i felt guilty for every little thing, whether it was my fault or not, i felt guilty for even existing.
之前的我是一位活泼开朗，很天真的一个小女孩！父母亲对我的教导是很认真的，他们教导我道德，自信，尊师重道！当我进入少年时我的美好世界就开始变了。我身边的亲友和长辈们开始在父母亲的背后批评我，侮辱我和用语言攻击我。从那时开始我就觉得自己很没有价值和罪恶感了！我的自尊心和自信被他们毁了。

If one person started feeling worthless and guilty, they start to lose interest or pleasure in activities that they enjoy. Because, what's the point? No one will be happy about it. I will definitely be insulted, judged and scolded even if I was doing something every teenagers will do. So, what's the point? Might as well just sit there and do nothing because everything you do ticks someone off, everything you do is considered 'not right' in someone's mind.
当一个人开始觉得自己很没有价值和罪恶感的时候，就会对自己感兴趣的活动感到无趣了！总觉得自己做的每一样事情都没有意义，会让别人不开心。觉得没有意思，提不起劲做任何的事情！

I will talk more into other symptoms and my own experience in my future post because I have arranged all the symptoms stated above according to my own experience and how they are related.
我会在接下来的文章里讨论有关抑郁症的其它症状。

Thank you for reading and stay tune for more.
谢谢！下期见。