Challenge #04084-K066: Essential Parenting Duties

in #fiction2 months ago

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No matter how old you are, or how tough you are, when a little child asks you to sit down and have tea with them, you sit down and have tea. -- Anon Guest

It's easy to have a... Reputation when one is both devilborn and the leader of a realm. Kosh had earned his. Elipsis, italics, and all. Though most of the rumours about him were greatly exaggerated. He had become a leader to fear over half the continent. People called him all kinds of things.

Most of his... Reputation came from slicing parts off of people who called him 'teuf'. That slur would not be tolerated and his tactic certainly taught them not to say it twice.

Even his puff titles included things like "Thrice-Sworn King" and "Death of the Devil Under the Mountain" and so on. When he entered a room, everyone else already present mentally went through everything they'd done to date and wondered if he already knew about it. He could merely smile at someone and they could break out in a cold sweat. He was currently on the floor as some of his daughters fetched him more tutus and flowers. One of them had filled a toy teapot from a water fountain near the castle nursery.

There were flowers and leaves on the plates - artistically arranged - to serve the role of finger foods, and a toy cake that could be 'cut' with a very blunt wooden knife.

"I should hope we're only playing at eating those as finger foods," murmured Kosh to his daughter, Joy. "A lot of these are poisonous."

Joy had a withering glare for him. "We know, Papa. You and Mama and our nurses and our bodyguards keep telling us."

Kosh couldn't help but chuckle as Uni and Tissy returned. One with tutus, and the other with flowers. The three girls decorated him, adding a glittering scarf to his overall ensemble.

"You are Lady Blatheringstoke," announced Tissy, threading flowers and feathers into his crown and hair. "And we are having a nice afternoon tea."

The girls had a tie-on tutu each, added over their nursery dresses, and varying attempts at crowns made of flowers, feathers, wire, and beads.

Kosh affected a falsetto voice. "Oh it is so delightful to have an afternoon tea at ten in the morning. Much more convenient, I should think."

The girls giggled at that one.

Joy poured the 'tea' as Uni dished out 'finger foods' with a small pair of tongs. Some were cakes. Some were petit-fours. Some were canapes. And of course everyone received a slice of 'cake'.

They were having quite the involved conversation of pure nonsense when Hanagon finally found him.

"There you are," said Kosh's seneschal. "The delegation from Shissareth has arrived early and they want to see you light the Blood Throne."

Kosh maintained his falsetto. "King Kormwind is absent. Today, I am the Lady Horseradish Blatheringstoke and am taking tea."

The girls found this hilarious.

[Photo by Christina Deravedisian on Unsplash]

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Now I’m trying to imagine the seneschal desperately trying to maintain formality 🤣

Knowing anyone inside Kosh's radius for longer than 24 hours, Hanagon would get that pained expression of someone who doesn't know if this is normal or if their boss has finally slipped their gourd XD

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