It's been over two months since my last post, and I can't ignore the repeated mentions of @dreemport. So, here I am again.
As I approach 30, I often wonder what I should have been doing to avoid the emotions I've been feeling lately.
Occasionally, I feel a twinge of envy toward those with steady, fixed-wage jobs. However, I quickly remind myself that I thrive on pursuing my own aspirations and prefer the freedom from rigid company policies that don't align with my personal style and plans. This realization fills me with joy and gratitude for my autonomy, even if it sometimes brings a bit of exhaustion.
I'm tired because I have no choice but to do well. If I fail, it's entirely my responsibility. No one else will take the blame, haha.
Another thing that sometimes stirs envy in me is seeing happy people.
There's a certain happiness in shallowness, but I can't seem to just float; I'm always sinking deep into my thoughts, analyzing and noting nearly everything.
On the other hand, it's actually a good thing that I'm a thoughtful, sober person. While it may be exhausting, at least I'm not mindlessly happy.
When I do laugh, it's something rare, so profound, so awesome, and it’s worth it.
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Thank you so much for dropping by and reading this far.☺️
I really wish I could just be here everyday and get back the momentum of doing well in blogging.
Photo is me and mine.