How would you characterize the change over time? What perspectives have changed? - @ironshield

There are so many. Usually it is small changes but I know over time they add up. I can choose some topics. Maybe I should write it as a post because it will be a bit lengthy. - Me, and thus this post...

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There is the obvious political journey. I've always been a bit of an outsider. I tended to have an aversion to peer pressure. It tended to have the opposite effect on me. Yet I was not a political person. In fact, early on I completely understand the "I don't do politics" mentality. I was definitely into philosophy, music, etc. Yet I was dragged kicking and screaming into the political arena many times in my late teens though I didn't know it at the time.

Dungeons & Dragons

I played Dungeons & Dragons. Yet that would be called Satanic and evil and they warned I might become psychotic and kill people or myself. This was a common thread of culture in the 1980s and it wouldn't be my only interest that was treated as such.

Dungeons & Dragons inspired me to become a voracious reader. It inspired me to think about the motivations of people. It inspired me to see opportunity no matter the short comings. We would often roll up characters and play the characters as they were rolled. This could include characters with very bad scores. It inspired me to try to act out different types of characters. If they were characters with very low scores they would be quite challenging. Yet I learned that playing those challenging characters actually often ended up being the most rewarding and memorable of experiences.

I learned what I call the Monty Haul character. The super character so powerful and likely possessing about anything they needed. BORING. No challenge. It was a natural path that most players I have known have taken. It also seems to be a path that a lot of movie and television writes fall prey to. If your character becomes too powerful it becomes increasingly difficult to find true challenge. The challenges you do find can end up quite cliché and repetitive. The uber powerful characters eventually become boring. That was a learning experience. It is one I suspect a lot of people still have yet to learn. Especially if I am to judge the writing in movies and TV series.

Anyway. I could see the value playing Dungeons & Dragons had brought to my life. Yet I was supposed to view it as evil, wicked, and the work of the devil.

It didn't fit. That was a clash with culture and what I was observing with actual experiences. The narrative seemed to be a lie. People were proposing laws, and rulings based upon the lie. I think it was a lie born from seeing their children become so obsessed with a game. It was new. They didn't understand why it was taking ahold of their children and they were becoming so passionate about it so they reacted in fear and made up narratives. Then they pushed those narratives as truth forgetting they were a product of their imagination when they were confused and fearful.

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I was exposed to music heavily all of my life. I'd go through phases of what was my favorite song, or music. I tended to gravitate over time to heavier and heavier music. The heavy music resonated the most with me. During a lot of this time my parents were both heavily in the throes of alcoholism. My family life at home could be chaotic and unpredictable. About the only predictable thing was that any plans we had as a family would cease to exist the moment either of my parents said "We're going down to the bar but tomorrow let's plan for X". It was a small town in the mountains with three bars year around. It was not uncommon for me to walk from bar to bar to check on my parents and ask for something. We were at poverty level. Poverty level is even worse when the money that your family does have is spent in the bar.

I for years HATED (there is some hate speech) alcohol. I despised everything about it. That would extend well into my mid-20s. I am 52 and haven't had a drink of alcohol since I was 16. Even then I can count the number of types I have tasted on one hand. I do not hate alcohol or any drug at this point. I think people should be able to do what they want but they should be responsible and accountable for their own choices. That is a change there that occurred over time.

Yet I wanted to convey my life when I became most heavily into music. I was not suicidal but I was absolutely fearless when it came to anyone threatening me. If they wanted to kill me, so be it. That lack of fear saved me a few times because I guess it made me quite intimidating. I backed down 5 drunk cowboys once with that fearlessness. That persisted until the birth of my first son. At that point I understood fear. If something happened to me, what would happen to my child... that was a paradigm shift. It happens almost immediately when you hold your tiny child in your hands for the first time. I know people that have had children understand. It is very different from holding someone else's child. It is a mental CLICK and you change. At least I did, and I know the same is true of a lot of other people.

Music

Heavier and heavier music.

Yes, I am a metal head. I am a metal head who HATED alcohol, and didn't do drugs. Though I'd frequently be stereotyped and accused of doing both.

I would see the Geraldo Rivera "Devil Worship" special and I actual watched it with my mother. She was actually a bit terrified because many of the warning signs they told people to watch out for in that special I did. Did I listen to heavy metal? Yep. Did I play Dungeons & Dragons? Yep. Did I have long hair? Yep. Did I wear concert T-Shirts, jackets with band emblems, etc? Yep. Did I draw pentagrams and other things on my notebooks? Yep.

Was I Satanic? Not even remotely.

Yet I was accused of it often enough that I entered the political realm, philosophical, psychological, and religious realms heavily. I just didn't understand that.

Persecution & Stereotypes

I was persecuted. I was stereotyped. I was a rebel. I was a radical.

The accusations didn't make me afraid. They made me intense. They made me study. They made me think. They made me observe. They made me learn.

I consumed religious texts, and I thought about them. I wrote fictional stories based upon such things. I wrote song lyrics about such things. I would debate.

I would get into people's faces. I would play mind games and I for awhile was into what I called Mind Fucking people but it wasn't really what it sounds like and it was a short lived thing. Really it was just me talking to people and watching their shock when they would realize I wasn't at all the person they thought I was simply by looking at me and the stereotype.

I would see people's mouths drop open. I'd see the shock. I'd also see people treat me almost like a genius or someone they should believe. I recognized the power. I understood how cults are born. I realized I could do something like that and immediately said "HELL NO!"

Rebel

I heard about a teacher in a Spanish class handing out Anti-Satanic pamphlets. I didn't have Spanish class. (I studied German back then) I went into the class. I told her something along the lines of...

"This quote you have from Iron Maiden on the front from the song Number of the Beast, is a direct quote from revelations. This peace symbol here is not a symbol of Satanism. This hand symbol here is not satanic it means 'I love you'. Finally, there is a thing called 'Separation of Church and State' I would appreciate it if you stop pushing this in your classroom."

She stopped. I didn't stick around to see her reaction. I did see it from other people.

I was described and written up in Crested Butte, Colorado newspaper as Satanic (It is a ski resort town about 30 minutes from the town I went to school in). No one ever interviewed me. They didn't know my name. They just described every inch of how I dressed. Some of which was unique to me.

I was once stopped by a cop on main street with some friends. He took my name, and the names of some of my friends because he said we looked "Suspicious".

The only people that would sometimes get in my face were cowboys, ranchers, etc. Though I was lucky they always backed down. Because I was not afraid of them at all. In hindsight I likely could have been very messed up.

By the time I was a senior I got along with everyone even the cowboys because they had all learned that I treated everyone as a friend until they gave me a reason not to. I didn't like being stereotyped so I very much tried not to stereotype other people.

That could be my earliest rebellion and political leanings. It also was early exposure to persecution and how people could make up rules and condemn people without knowing the facts.

Heavy metal was my outlet. Without it to blow off steam to I likely would have hurt, or killed some people and ended up in prison. I had plenty to be angry over. I dumped that energy into the music. I don't think the people condemning it understand how freeing and liberating it can be as an outlet for such things. The music was my drug. At the time it probably was the single most important thing in my life.

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The first time I became aware of actual politics was after I was old enough to vote. It was when Bob Dole ran. I remember it because it was when I realized I was not normal. I didn't fit what seemed most common.

I don't remember the content of the speeches. I simply remember Bob Dole giving one that people did not like. Including me.
Six months later he gave another speech and people were cheering. Why? He changed pretty much everything.

I was saying "Hey, but he said this six months ago". I started learning that most people don't remember what politicians said one month ago, let alone six months ago. They vote based upon the most recent thing the politician said. I hadn't realize yet at that time that in truth they tend to vote however the television tells them to vote, and attack/hate whomever the television tells them to.

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Ron Paul

Ron Paul was a catalyst for me becoming very political. Ron Paul said all of these things that were different from anything else I had been hearing. Some of them sounded absolutely nutty. "This guy is a nut" I then researched the things I thought were nutty and learned I didn't know what I thought I knew. He wasn't a nut at all. I just didn't know the information. I had not been educated on it. The television calling him a nut is where a lot of that was coming from. Get rid of the Department of Education. Are you crazy we can't do that? Then I learned it didn't even get implemented until the mid-80s and I barely experienced any of the DoE in my own education. I also had seen what the DoE was doing to my own kids. (I had been on a Parent Teacher Student board as treasurer, then president for a stint). "You mean he is proposing we get rid of something I didn't really get taught by myself, and my education was far better than what my children are getting?" Okay, so maybe that isn't nutty at all. I didn't agree with Ron Paul 100% but I'd say 99% of what he said I did agree with. I learned a lot from him. I know a lot of people did.

I became a delegate for him in 2008. I didn't go far. He eventually dropped out. Obama promised to abolish the "Patriot Act" which was a big one for me. I voted for him. Then he proceeded to essentially be Bush 2.0 and everything he said that convinced me to vote for him he did the opposite. I didn't care that he was black. In 2012 I ran as a delegate again. I went through the entire process up through state. I stopped just short of nationals as I advocated for others to go. If I wanted to go I don't doubt my fellow delegates may have sent me. I witnessed a lot of corruption first hand from within the RNC.

I considered myself a Libertarian who was working from within the GOP since they have rigged it so only the two parties stand a chance.

I continued to view myself as a Libertarian for some time.

I also thought the word Liberal was a bad thing. I hadn't realized it was hijacked by Marxists and their actions had tarnished it as their actions didn't match the meaning of the word. By the actual meaning of the word I was a Liberal in many respects. They now qualify that as a Classical Liberal. Libertarians often referred to themselves as Socially Liberal, and Fiscally Conservative.

Anarcho-Capitalism (aka ANCAP)

Then I encounter Anarcho-Capitalism. I had been conditioned to view the word Anarchy as the guys in Road Warrior with the spiked hair that wanted to kill everyone. That was the propaganda. It still largely is today.
I learned really all it meant is No Rulers. The Capitalism part of that referred to Free Market. No Rulers, and Free Market.

I then learned of the Non-Aggression Principle though really I'd been living that way most of my life. I just didn't have a name for it.

I listened to Larkin Rose and many of the Ancap celebrities. I liked a lot of what I heard. I still like a lot of it.

I no longer consider myself 100% ancap.

I'd say I am more of a minarchist. That meets somewhere between the Ancap and the Libertarian. I think we should have an absolutely minimalized number of laws. We should only have those that are absolutely necessary. I think ultimately we could have a small enough number of laws to where virtually everyone would know them and you wouldn't really need attorneys/lawyers to tell you about them. It'd be pretty simple. Yet it would also put a lot of powerful and wealthy people out of power.

That journey from Libertarian -> Anarcho-Capitalist -> Minarchist very much happened on steemit and here. That is a change that has occurred over time.

If I had to label myself now the only label that truly fits is INDIVIDUAL. I don't fit nicely into any particular category.

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Religion

I've refined many of my thoughts on religion here. Those have changed over time. I didn't know what I was. I knew the label Agnostic might fit. I also knew that Atheist could fit. Though that didn't quite fit with some of my experiences in life. I encountered Unitarian Universalism in my journey and thought "Hey, if I had to go to church these guys seem welcoming to all" Yet something still didn't work for me. I have a problem with Dogma and other people telling me what to believe. It doesn't matter how it is wrapped. Even UU still had that. It just gave you the ability to choose among several wrappers. I haven't considered religious texts to be "The word of God" for a very long time because I researched them too far back in history. They for me are the word of man. They may be inspired by God, but still they are the word of man and frequently edited. Having seen them used to justify persecution no matter how good a religion claims to be I was mostly very anti-organized religion. So I was adrift. Then I learned about Deism. What the hell is Deism? Thomas Jefferson was a Deist? Thomas Payne was a Deist? How can that be? I was told all of the founding fathers were Christians.

Deism

What is this Deism? It is a religion that doesn't believe in revelation, or that bibles are the word of God. To them there is a creator. We should observe and use reason. The bible if there is one is written into reality itself around us and is vast. Deists do see value in moral teachings and history in religious texts.

For awhile I called myself an Atheist/Deist being very aware of the contradiction in that. It was a conversation starter. I would explain it this way.

If I simplified things down to their simplest I saw two possibilities. A) There has always been something, and never been a state of nothingness. B) There was nothing, and then there was something.

If It is the first case A then that implies there was no creator. It always existed so nothing needed to create it. B on the other hand required a creator. I couldn't prove which of those cases was true. Therefore, I called myself an Atheist/Deist.

Some people might say... "Isn't that Agnostic". I'd say no. It wasn't that I wasn't sure about the creator. It was that I wasn't sure about A or B.

That journey happened on Steemit. I am now in the Deist camp. I think the probability is that there is a creator. That journey happened during a stream of consciousness writing on steemit.

It was a post where I said "If we were in a simulation how would we the simulants know..." I began explaining simulations, increasing complexity in our own, procedural design, and discussing the bounds of infinity. I proposed some things we look for to detect simulation within our own simulation. As I proposed these things I indicated perhaps we could look towards similar places (bounds of infinity either microscopic or macroscopic) and we would encounter similar oddities. In that journey I realized that there was a strong potential we had already encountered such things.

That lead me to decide there is a high probability we are inside of a simulation.

IF we are in a simulation then that requires a creator. It doesn't define what the creator is. It actually makes all other religions including Christianity potentially possible. A simulation could be designed exactly as these religions dictate. It could also start with some content pregenerated. It is of course speculation. Yet it made things possible.

Since I personally think it is probable we are in a simulation it turns out the entire simulation hypothesis fits rather nicely within the scope of what is called Deism.

Thus, I call myself a Deist. That happened here. Some of it happened in real time as I wrote.

Now you see why I did this as a post.

It will be a wall of text and I don't know how many people will bother reading it. If you made it through it all thank you very much for that time. I know time is valuable.

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EDIT: To be clear thousands of things have changed. Those were just some of the easy ones to define.