We all have a different boiling point, some of us are easily angered, others are cool-tempered. Kindly share one thing that makes you angry, how long do you stay mad, and what or who can pacify you.
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Hello, beautiful ladies of the hive! With this question from @ifarmgirl I am joining this week's LOH contest #95.
I always hear people around me especially my colleague say;
"Let us not stress ourselves so much so we won't get wrinkles early.
When I am stressed I also get angry easily. They say wrinkles will appear early on my face. Though it is said in a jest, I believe that stress can take its toll on us. It can affect our health and even our relationship with people.
Stress is inevitable especially when you are a working mom. Being a working mom is hard. Juggling work and motherhood responsibilities can be so stressful. I work during the day and when I get home, taking care of my children is all on me. I have no one to help me since my husband is working in the city. When I am stressed, I am irritable and easily get angered.
Stress coupled with fluctuating hormones is a toxic combination. I bet ladies and women can relate to this. Hormones can affect our mood since it acts everywhere in the body including the part of the brain that controls emotions.
I am not easily angered on normal days but when stress and fluctuating hormones are combined, I burst out in anger even on small things and my children are the receiving end of my mood swings. Things like spilled food on the table, my children who can't easily follow what I said or them being noisy, or anything that irritates me which I just normally brush off during normal days.
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I am working on controlling my temper on that kinds of days since I don't want to leave scars on my children's hearts. It is ok to be angry. It can be a way to discipline them. I want to be angry for a reason. I want them to understand that I am angry because they have done something terrible and not because of those petty reason. I always regret when I blurt out words out of anger. My eldest once told me, that she is scared when I get angry. That hit me hard. I don't want them to be scared of me but I want to be a mom who they can talk to without hesitation. I want them to feel that they can confide in me. I don't want them to be scared but to understand the reason why I get angry and be able to ponder on their actions and how it affect other people. I realize that the way I handle my temper affects them emotionally and mentally.
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Who can pacify me?
The one that can pacify me is also me. My guilt of hurting the feeling of my children when I lose control. That is why I always say sorry when I am calmed down and explain to them why I felt that way. But the damage has been done there. It is harder to repair the damage than refraining from doing something that can hurt people.
Remember:
"People will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.” - Maya Angelou
...and that includes our children.
We are women. We are strong, stronger than our emotions.
I am more emotional and moody when on my period, haha. I just eat sweets to calm myself and probably watch some movies. 😊
!PIZZA
It is not easy to be a woman... We have to deal with many things including our body 😁. Better eat chocolates and watch tv away from people to avoid conflict. Heheh
Yeah, chill lang ta kanunay ren, kay matiguwang tag dali 😁. Bitaw normal ra gyud kaayo na masuko ba, pero at least imu mapasabot ug maayo sa imung mga bata nganu nasuko ka. You are indeed a wonderful mom to your children 😊.
Hehhe only time will judge kung mau ko nga inahan det.
You are ren, wala mi karapatan mu judge nimu. It won't make you less of a mother if that's how you train your children.
I understand what you are going through. It is hard when outside forces or even your children are the match to the short fuse you might have on a particular day. Your quote from Maya Angelou is very accurate. To this day, I can remember even some childhood memories of those who made me feel inadequate or ugly or whatever. Don't forget to stop and breathe! Just taking a few seconds or a minute or two will help to diffuse anger. Thank you for sharing and have a lovely day!
Thabk you mam @elizabethbit ... I'll take your advice to stop and breathe. I think thay will be very helpful.
You are very welcome! I've had to deal with a lot of people over the years who are angry and I can't respond in kind, because it's at work. All I can do is breathe. Take care!🤗💜
I feel it can be healthy for children to see adult emotion and a healthy way of working through it. Like you being open and saying, hey, I got mad, sorry about that. I am a grandmother. My two sons are grown with families now. The process of understanding anger as a projection, not a base emotion, has allowed me to develop more patience. Time is a great teacher. Thanks for sharing your heart. 🏵🏵
Thank you for sharing your thoughts maam. I have so much learn about dealing with emotions. Indeed time is a great teacher.
It certainly is, and good for you for being on that journey. 👏🏻👏🏻
Truth, I can relate. It takes a lot of self-discipline to stay calm when things aren't going the way we want them to be and the "anger" hormone easily kicks in. But it's good that you are working on yourself and trying to not hurt your children's feelings.
We are stronger indeed than our emotions, I totally agree with you on this. We can be better :)
Thank you Tatskie for sharing your story. It's a lovely read and something to ponder upon. Have a great weekend!
Thank you also foe this question @ifarmgirl. I learned a lot from the comments and sharing of thoughts and experience from the the ladies.
Cheers :) It's nice to hear that you do, it's the same with me too :)
Cheers! Have a wonderfl day
Dli gyud ko sure sa akong self if kaya nako mahimung inahan same sa imuha, basin akong ihatud akong anak ni mama 🤣🤣🤣
Heheh makaya ra jid ug no choice na. Pero ug na kas laing lugar lisod isalig sa laibg taw nga di nato suhito
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Di just lalim maging inahan ky halos tanan naa na ba. Sahay moginhawa na lng ka ug lawum diba.
Mao jid sis. Ginahawa na lng jud aron di mahigh blood. 😁
Lisod jod mahimong nanay sis mao mohilom nlaman ko ug mag nag na ahu nnay hahh