March 8th International Women's Day: The socio-economic impact of Covid-19 on women and narcissistic abuse

Good day Hive!

Since yesterday, I have been waffling back and forth if I should write about this and how it will be received. Women's rights topics tend to not get received well anywhere so here goes nothing I guess...

I have been pushing for gender equality most of my adult life for many reasons that was based of my not so great beginnings in life. Obviously, many women in Canada or the developed world don't go thru any of this and many in the developing world go thru far worse. For most of my adult life, I have made my way in a male dominated work force and found a way to thrive. Are we fully equal? Not yet. We had come a long way but covid-19 has thrown a big wrench in women's rights all over the globe, some more than others. I'm not writing this as a boo-hoo poor me story but more so to shed light on a very real issue that very much still goes on today and is about to get worse unless we as a society come up with solutions. I try to observe trends, separating between the true Feminist's and equality movement and the not so great Femenazi man-hating agenda( I will not dispute is also toxic gender trait). Some issues I observe the repercussions in society, many I have felt myself. I hope this can open a few eyes.

Here is a little bit of my background so you can understand my point of view and why some of these things are more important than some realize. I was born out of wedlock in a super Catholic community and there I began my life committing my first first deadly sin. Being born a girl out of wedlock without a father. Yes even in a country seen so progressive as Canada, in the '80's I still grew up in quite an archaic French patriarchal system where women belonged barefoot and preggo in the kitchen while the manly man goes to work, comes home, abuses family, beats the step kid born out of wedlock everyone got stuck with, everyone goes to bed with a smile on their face to start it all over again the next day. To top it all off, I was born bi-racial in a white community, in a white family being part Indigenous, the most marginalized demographics in Canada for centuries. Wow I must have burned down the wrong barn in my previous life...YIKES.

Luckily, during my childhood, the debate of child abuse was becoming a topic of interest and schools were paying more attention to the signs trying to rescue them from their home, ushering an era of silence no more. I was 10 when I was removed and placed to be cared for and raised by the province. Did it help? Well I grew up so freaking confused with no trusted adult to talk to as I became nothing more than someone's paycheck and burden, being lied to or dismissed from all sides if any issues occurred. For the most part, it didn't accomplish much and ended up back in the hands of abusive parents due to lack of resources.

My early to mid teens were mostly spent crashing at friends houses, in and out of various group homes, shelters for abused women, shelters for young girls, group homes run by the province (juvenile detention and unwanted kids go to the same facilities good or bad) and being "allowed" back home several times in between. Why did my mom hate me since birth? I will never know, I always assumed I was a rape baby because nobody wanted me or wanted to tell me anything much about where I came from, like everything about my being was offensive to them, maybe it was my race. I never knew why and stopped caring long ago. And these people wonder why I don't talk to them. 😂

My friends, never underestimate the amount of sickos, pedophiles and just overall people that like to harm children that roam within your communities. From family members, friends, school teachers, cops, coaches, summer camp, politicians prominant business owners. It's RAMPANT EVERYWHERE. Trust me. They don't pick on every child, they appear like outstanding members of society and most likely are Narcisitic in nature therefore good at lying and manipulating their way out of any bad press. Their children of choice? Foster children, children from broken homes, unwanted children. The biggest misconception is that it's going to be some creep in a white van with no windows handing out candy that are a threat. No offense but such a naïve thought.

They seek vulnerable children and offer them the promise of helping them. Teachers with no moral compass sexually harassing teen girls like myself. Sometimes touching, sometimes making me out to be like I'm bad and disruptive singling me out and humiliating me in front of the class forcing me to sit next to him while showing me pornographic images he had hidden under other student's homework. Being stalked where ever I went because of the lack of parental supervision. Nobody in the class ever spoke up. Why? Couldn't they see this was wrong? I tried to speak out, I tried to switch schools.

He sweet talked his way out for an additional 20 years until he eventually went to jail with a soft sentence claiming it was the first time as his defense with a different student , he was a teacher for 40 years doing this to others and he had friends just like him, there was an entire network of them in the entire school district and they communicated who the easy targets were. Naturally being unheard and trying to take the situation in my own hands and to protect myself, I started skipping school altogether and that led me to getting kicked out of the house by my mom. There you have it. 15 years old, kicked out of my home for saying no more to sexual abuse by a 40 year old. I stayed at my grand-parents too for a week but they eventually kicked me out as well after they were spoon-fed convenient lies.

I'm pretty sure my mom has an undiagnosed case of NPD and they will lie lie lie and do whatever they need to do to manipulate public perception and coming out like a hero-victim to be praised by the gods. She went home, told everyone I had run away, called the police and told everyone who tried to help me how horrible of a human being I was, even tho they were lies and I ended up in the streets. Middle of winter, 15 years old, sleeping in public bathrooms and train stations for warmth and safety on cold nights. Digging in garbage cans to accumulate enough cans to sell so I could by some food. The reason? Until I was 16, I could not apply for any government ID, services or even get a job without the consent of a parent and she withheld all of that from me out of spite.

Starting to be too old to even be the province's problem, the outlook was grim. Being even more vulnerable to society's morally ill, shit went from bad to worse and even worse from there. Yet I still couldn't get any help. Eventually I turned 16, was able to find a low wage job paying $5.25 per hour and found some dungeon basement to rent for cheap while I slept on a sofa bed. That was my coming of age story my friends, in a so called developed country. In my young life, I had no concept of race or that I was even bi-racial. I had white friends, Native friends, French friends, English friends. We all found a way to communicate and have fun. Later I found out I was being targeted for something more, something exotic. Maybe it's just an aspect I had never considered. Being part Indigenous female.

In Canada, one of the biggest issue for Aboriginal women and girls is abuse, raped / missing and murdered. It's a real problem here. We are considered at risk population and since the beginning of white settlements, we have been traded and stolen from the land to be sold to husbands or taken from families as young children to be sold into white families. Seen as a sexual object of fantasy perpetuated by a Disney movie, some of you may have guessed it "Pocahontas".

I'm not one for cancel culture or anything just stating a fact. I know many of you are probably laughing thinking did she just say that? Yeah I did. It's a thing for real. I have even been called such while being raped with a knife to my throat, I have been called such by white men trying to get sex from me, I have gotten called that by strange men trying to get me to climb in their vehicle. The movie represent the first Missing and Murdered Indigenous Women and underage girl at the hands of Settlers and yes it's made into a cute movie for kids and ya'll smile at how cute of a story it is. Sick Sick Sick. I try really hard to not be bitter about this notion but some days are harder than others... In case you ever wondered why Natives hate that movie. Not as cute of a movie now is it? (See MMIWG or Red Dress movement)

I'm sure they wanted to legit give me a ride somewhere but I don't think it was to work. Even at 16 years old, I couldn't afford to be a naïve kid, not that I ever had the chance to really be a kid in the first place. The police rarely gives these cases any attention and the aggressor gets to carry onto the next young girl. Luckily for me I managed to keep myself from ending up in the bottom of a river. I eventually ran away from all the crap in my early 20's because I felt like I had no other choice for my own safety along with the lack of opportunities in my home province for someone of my gender or background.

Fast-Forward to now, after having spent 15 years in a male dominated workplace, we have tackled many issues and made the environment slightly more welcoming and supportive for other trail blazing young women ready to take on the torch and make things better for the generation that will come after them. Leaders raising leaders. Over the last year, naturally many men and women were impacted by covid-19 and the widespread lockdowns and the economic shutdown the nearly brought the global economy to it's knees ( we are ot out of the woods yet) Many of the Economic impacts can only be observed after the fact.

New studies have come out in Canada and around the world about the impact on both genders. Naturally, being already at a high disproportionate was suicides in working age men, already an epidemic was pushed even higher. Elevated stress in men also led to higher rates of spousal and family abuse therefore increasing the rates of child abuse and neglect. Hospitals around Canada have been raising the alarm in more injuries related to child abuse being treated as well. The closure of schools, employments and childcare has put a damper in the ability to reach such services along with community support required for one to escape an abusive situations as you can see from my story, is much easier said then done. Being removed from the community makes it easier to hide bruises, marks and other signs of abuse that would otherwise be recognized. 1 in 3 women in Canada will experience a sexual crime/ violence /spousal abuse in their lifetime(according to many reported statistics).

To make matters worse, comparing job impact, 500 000 women were pushed out of the workforce for various reasons compared to 10 000 men that were not able to find new employment in Canada alone. These reasons vary from having to provide childcare or care for an aging or sick relative with women taken on 90% of unpaid work around the world compare to the pre-pandemic 80%(according to UN statistics). Other reasons many of the low-paid jobs in the retail, service and cleaning industries that were terminated with the shut-down were mainly women's positions. A contributing factor that is we still very much operate in a male driven world where we are still considered the lesser gender. As males get favored over newly created jobs, the effects of the pandemic are having an even worse impact on single formerly working mothers.

https://www.mckinsey.com/featured-insights/future-of-work/covid-19-and-gender-equality-countering-the-regressive-effects

https://www.un.org/sexualviolenceinconflict/wp-content/uploads/2020/06/report/policy-brief-the-impact-of-covid-19-on-women/policy-brief-the-impact-of-covid-19-on-women-en-1.pdf

It was already well known that many women tend to have lower salaries, lower savings therefore less ability to deal with the repercussions of work shortages. This also impacts the amounts put into future pension plans, retirement goals and so on. Many of these women are expected to never being able to return to the workforce even after the pandemic. Many were small business owners that were forced to shutdown, limiting their access to government programs and taking away their entrepreneurial independence. Knowing how hard it is to get recognized in the workforce and the amount of work one has to put in professionally, this is a huge set back for all. It's like having to do it all over again, push for a right to just have a chance at a paycheck again. For such a woke society we seem to live in, it's kind of shameful.

Women still represented almost 40% of the total world's workforce(pre-pandemic). In terms of GDP, that's a huge loss. Is this a problem we can afford to ignore as a society? To leave women and girls with no opportunities to improve their lives and be self sufficient? To leave abuse survivors that already have limited opportunities with even less? Covid-19 has had severe impacts that health officials and politicians around the world refuse to acknowledge as equally harmful if not more than the virus itself. I thank my lucky stars that I want thru my journey during a time of archaic beliefs rather than a time of pandemic. Obviously my job has been impacted as in, I'm lucky if I get one in the near future and I hardly got any work last year. I'm willing to sit it out and let the dust settle and somewhat enjoy the break for now since there isn't much point in stressing over things I can't control and re-asses what comes next. But how many NEED opportunities right NOW to get themselves out of the ashes the universe gave them?

As women, how have you observed the pandemic impact you or the women around you? Each country is different and I can only make observations based on my own experiences and country since life and the challenges we each face are so different around the world. In a world that has grown so cold, we need to be more observant of our surroundings so we can learn to help those who need an out, their lives may depend on it. BE YOUR SISTER'S KEEPER. To this day, nobody in my extended family can't be bothered to ask me why I was in the streets as a 15 year old girl. It's that easy to be forgotten by society, don't be the one that ignored a child in need. You will probably not want to hear or imagine the repercussions of that. Think of all the Jeffrey Epstein and Peter Nygaard victims. They were ignored girls in trouble too, just like I was. How many do you think there is that continue to go thru this? The longer the economy remains shut down and reduced access to women, it's more girls driven to these sickos of society.

I wanted to write this with the upcoming International Women's Day on March 8th to shed light on issues that plague women and young girls in the developed world like Canada with high human rights standards and just to show how easy it can be to be someone you know if you don't pay attention. It is meant to inspire abuse survivors to embrace their journey and get stronger, share their pain along with the wisdoms to help silent victims feel like they are not alone, maybe one day they can speak of their experience for the betterment of society. How about the women in other countries where the female movements are not as advanced, I would like to know how the pandemic have affected you? Has it set back the right's movements you may have already been attempting? Lets talk about it.