It was a quite beautiful weekend in Michigan this past weekend. The weather was practically perfect and both Saturday and Sunday it really felt like Spring was finally here. @mrsbozz and I had talked about trying again to make the road trip we originally had planned the day we said goodbye to Jovi, but instead, we decided to head down watch our niece and nephews play flag football.
They recently joined a flag football league that their mom decided to start when she realized that their school district didn't have its own program. Given the size of their district, it just made sense to keep the kids local. They ended up having 25 separate teams or something like that. It was pretty impressive and ran rather smoothly for their first Saturday of games.
That's not really the point of this post...
We were driving home when @mrsbozz noticed I was sniffing and wiping my face. She asked me if I had taken allergy meds earlier that morning and I assured her that it was not allergies.
Of course then she asked what was going on...
I took my sunglass of to let her see that I had been crying.
She was actually a little taken back because up until that point we had both been doing pretty well with the loss of our dog. I can't tell you the last time before that I had broken down. I felt like I had actually finished the week pretty good.
I'm not saying I'm totally over it, because I know I will never be, but the whole time healing wounds thing had definitely started to take place.
My problem is (especially when I am driving), I get in my own head too much. My mind finds all these tangents to run away on and some of them are good, some bad, and some just downright WTF! In this particular case, I was thinking about the fact that I never get to take a photo of Jovi again.
I'm actually getting a little misty right now just typing this.
No more cute photos of her on the couch.
No more pictures of her laying on the floor on her side content with everything in the world.
No more photos of her looking out the window faithfully fulfilling her neighborhood watch duties.
No more pictures where we try to figure out just how she got her body in that position and how uncomfortable it must be.
No more photos of her rolling around in the first decent snow of the year.
All we have are memories and the many (or few) photos we have taken up to that point.
We have been slowly picking up her things here and there as we clean the house. There are some things that we just haven't been able to touch. Like her bed, her toys, and her dishes. You can see in the photo above that there is still water in the dish. That's the water we put in there the day we said goodbye to her. We have just been slowly letting it evaporate.
Something told me the other day to take a picture of it. Sure, I knew I could use it in a post, but over time, that water will be gone. Then the bowls will be gone, and finally all we will have left are the memories and photos from our time with Jovi.
So I'm tell you. Take that photo. I don't care how dumb it seems at the time. I don't care how much your friends or family makes fun of you. I don't care how ridiculous you feel.
Just take the picture
With the ever increasing ability and storage in smartphones these days, there's absolutely no reason not to.
Eventually, those photos are all we are going to have.
This ended up being a lot harder post to write than I thought. I've cried more this morning than I probably have in a week. If you follow my blog regularly, don't be surprised if you continue to see photos of Jovi here and there in future posts.
These pictures are treasures and artifacts of a life that brought so much joy. It would be a crime not to share them with the world.
Sports Talk Social - @bozz.sports
Heartbreaking. It is the worst that our furbabies have such relatively short lives. My boys are 12 and 14… just thinking about the short amount of time I have left sends me into tears. And I totally relate to crying in the car. I do that a lot. It is quiet and you are alone, so it is definitely easy to just get into a loop thinking about sad or stressful stuff.
Sending you and Mrs. Bozz hugs.
Thank you, I appreciate that! It's some of the worst pain I have ever been through to be honest. Just enjoy all the time you have with them now!
Just take the photo. It's funny when you think about how that advice has changed. When I started taking photos I was in elementary school, using a 35mm camera my Italian grandfather gave me. I forget the exact price of a roll of film back then, but I do remember it took all my allowance. As a result, each photo was precious and I'd only snap that shot when I knew it was perfect!
And now here we are in the opposite world, where we can take as many photos as we want. Funny how it all changed.
Indeed. I'm kind of glad it has went that way. I mean yeah, you get a lot more silly and worthless photos, but then again, you might just be glad you took that one some day. I'd give anything to have more photos of Jovi right now. Even the hundreds we have just doesn't feel like enough.
Pictures make great memories, always take one when in doubt! I know how tough it is to lose a dog, especially after all those years as part of the family. I feel for you.
It's easy to get lost in your head when you drive, I do the same. It's just going to take a lot of time...
Thanks, I appreciate that. I just need to make sure I am doing a better job of taking those photos because you just never know.
You never really do know unfortunately... Life is short!
Take that photo is great advice. Those waves of sadness will come and go. I still get them over a year after our little guy left us. I don't know if this will help you but I have a picture of Amstel's on my phone's lock screen. It makes it feel like a little bit of him is still with me.
I think my wife has Jo on one of her screens. I have thought about putting her on my desktop, but I am not sure I am quite there yet. I need to be sure I am not busting into tears everytime I look at my computer screen!
I'm sorry. 😔 They are loved very much and they are an important part of the family. They are so pure and so loyal. A hug. ❤️
Thank you! I appreciate it! She is missed beyond measure!
i'm with you on the taking the pictures. Almost all the photos I take are of Nadi and I never delete them.
Just keep taking them. No matter how many you have, you will still feel like it isn't enough. Trust me!
It will get better. Hang in there.
That dog face call everyone attention lol ☝🏻💌
You would think so, but then again maybe not.
We take so many photos now, but it was different years ago. I got my first digital camera when the kids were young. Now I have Google reminding me of what I was up to years ago. That can mean bringing back sad memories of pets who left us. We have to remember the good times we had with them.
Yeah, we have already gotten some memory prompts after she was gone and they have hit pretty hard.
Almost got in a fight at the last Festival of Movement for that reason. But get this, I was standing on the stairs! This guy was all, "thanks for blocking my view!" I looked at him real funny, cuz he was sitting in the aisle and said, "ya, I like your hat too."
When I have too much time to think, that's when I get in trouble. I've done enough crying and I try not to go down that road any longer. Occasionally I'm laying in bed or sitting on the couch and something touches me and the feelings come up. But things have gotten much better for us. I hope has time passes things get much better for you guys as well. The pictures are awesome. That's one thing I really don't care about… What people think when I'm taking pictures. I know one day I would need them. I don't know if this is going to seem weird to you or not, but I avoid driving past the veterinarian clinic. Just because that's the last place we were when we said goodbye. Although I don't avoid our bedroom, and that's where we say goodbye to Pepper. Now that I'm thinking about it I am probably being foolish. Lol.
I know what you mean. We had to drive by our vet the other day and it was definitely on both of our minds. We finally moved the living room around today, but we still haven't put anything away. We got her new box and I will probably post a picture of it tomorrow. Had to cancel her meds through Costco the other day and got choked up when they asked me why.
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