The Art of the Throw

The prompt a day word prompt for yesterday was “Throw” and that’s what I’m writing about. I know a lot about this subject, as it’s a natural reaction for apes to want to throw things. I don’t know… it’s something that just overcomes you and you gotta do it. - A. Skunk Ape

Throwing is something I’m good at, and throwing things is fun. I’ve recently tried Frisbee golf, if you’re familiar at all with that sport. Throwing a Frisbee is a lot different from throwing a pile of poo, so throwing a Frisbee is something we must practice doing, in order to be able to make a “hole in one” on the course.

If you’ve never been to a Frisbee golf course, you’ll be pleased to find that most of them, (at least around where I live), don’t charge anyone to play. That means a lot of cooperation and respect for the other players is necessary. Sometimes I’ve wished that rule didn’t exist.

As I’ve already mentioned in previous posts, at a very low point in my life, after my modeling career was over and my clothing line fizzled out, I fell into some hard times, and I went so low as to even start throwing poo at zoo workers, or as I like to say, “fling,” as the move, when properly done, actually makes use of the flinging motion.

giphy.com

Here is an old gif that’s floated around for years and years, and I’m sure people think it’s hilarious, but it’s an embarrassment if you’re an ape and you see this “performance.”

I happen to know this weasel of an ape. He’s about as silly an ape as you’ll ever see. He says that when he flings a pile, he never intends to really hit anyone, and he just wants to “scare them.” The thing that’s embarrassing though, is when he runs off, like he's afraid they’re going to jump over the fence and beat him up or something. It’s a pathetic, cowardly performance, and he should be ashamed of himself.

I’d like to focus more on the mechanics of his fling. He throws with a very good motion, and I suspected right away that he was intentionally not hitting any of the human workers, because his fling was straight, had good power, and hit the target, (the wall opening), with good force but it was way over their heads. There is no doubt in my mind that if he wanted to, he could have hit a bullseye on a worker’s face with ease.

When I was throwing back in the day, I always hit my target, every time. I never missed, not even once. I hated doing it though, deep down inside, because it brought me down to their level. I’m ashamed of how I acted during that period, for that very reason.

As I mentioned earlier, being trained in throwing poo piles is detrimental to throwing Frisbees, as a different motion is required to throw a Frisbee. The movement required to learn to throw the Frisbee is difficult for the average ape to execute successfully, while the mechanics that make the fling work are inherent.

Now that I’ve learned how to throw a Frisbee, I’m planning on spending a considerable amount of my free time playing Frisbee golf, and maybe someday I’ll even be good enough to play in the Frisbee golf Masters tournament.