blue boxes

caramel macchiato again. well you know that paralysis when your mind is flooded with choices? yeah too sweet today. i told myself i’d stop drinking it but here i am no choice is still a choice right?
sat near the glass window so i can see people pass by. mall lights look like fake sunsets as always.
there’s this bakeshop across saw blue boxes everywhere. they look soft. can boxes look soft?

i started doodling before i even noticed i was doing it.
lines first, then the shape of her hands, then nothing made sense for a minute.
someone bumped my chair wait is that a wake up call?. i almost spilled the coffee. the cup left a ring on my notes. i kind of like it.

the woman in the shop kept tying ribbons.
she looked calm but i wonder if she’s tired of blue. i would be.
my drawing keeps melting into something else. now it’s not her anymore, it’s just light and crumbs.

i forgot what song was playing.
maybe that’s why it felt peaceful.
maybe that’s why i kept drawing.

—banini