Is Your Family Poisoning Your Happiness?

in GEMS3 years ago

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Source: Photo by Matheus Bertelli from Pexels

An hour or three ago, I was reading through a PDF that I found online, with 400 motivational quotes in there. A roofing sales company, Roofing Life, had spread the book online. I don't know if they are selling tiles or quotes. Was amused to see their name on the last page. They got the quotes all from the public domain.

The book of 31 pages contain quite a few very insightful quotes, by well-known motivational speakers such as Dale Carnegie, Earl Nightingale, Zig Ziglar, Brian Tracy, Napoleon Hill, and others. I thought it would be worth it to do a quick post about some of the best ones that I highlighted on the document as reference for myself in the future. I'll keep the striker for last.

Thomas Edison, that thief of patents agh sorry inventor, features in there as well, but after I found out years ago how he ripped off Nikola Tesla, I suspect he stole many of the wisdom attributed to him from other people too. So he can chuck it, I'm not quoting anything he allegedly said.

Benjamin Franklin apparently had enough time on his hands to both run a country and pen down some great sayings, too. “A man wrapped up in himself makes a very small bundle.” Right!? This quote of him is what made me type this post. Why keep those wisdoms to myself, when it can maybe spur a reader into action to do something great, or lift someone out of a depressed mood? So I'm typing this in an unbundled posture.

“A strong foundation at home sets you up for a strong foundation at work”, says Robin Sharma, a person I've never heard of before, but that has many of his quotes in the book. This is a sad quote, when one thinks about it. So many people grow up in unhappy homes, with moaning and bitching and fighting all the time, by plain incompetent parents whose actions keep their children back from success. Children from happier homes have a much better chance to succeed in life.

So if you see me trolling or attacking a parent somewhere online, just know I'm doing it because they said something that told me they're such parents to their kids. Or for one of 27 other reasons.

Want to take up painting? The following advice can totally only be applied to painting, and nowhere else in life. “Action is the foundational key to success”, says the famous painter Pablo Picasso. And there you have it. If you want to have a pretty bunch of paint on a canvas, you have to take action. Maybe, and this is just a satirical guess, one can apply this advice to other aspects of life too. Set a goal, and take action. I like that it is so short and powerful. The kind of thing people should tattoo on themselves instead of the Chinese symbols for rice or fortune cookies.

A common quote, just in different words every time, by several motivational speakers like Earl Nightingale (one of my three favorites of all times) is this one from Brian Tracy: “Any thought or action that you repeat over and over again will eventually become a new habit.” Napoleon Hill (my second favorite) said: “What you think about, is what you will become.” Different quotes yes, but damn, so close like damn is to swearing. Your thoughts determine your actions determine your success. Pay heed to what goes through your brain, and keep it in check. Think happy thoughts.

Another recurring quote in different words by different speakers is this one from a guy I haven't heard about before either, David J. Schwartz: “Belief triggers the power to do.”

Hit the brakes, and think about that again. You need to believe in your goal, as a trigger to get motivated. This is like step number three on the road to success. (One, have a goal, two, plan the goal, three, believe in it.) Beliefs are a regular topic among speakers.

US president Theodore Roosevelt, that also managed to do some thinking in between running a country, said: “Believe you can, and you're halfway there.” By that logic – and with me being a critical fucker that questions what I read before I just fall for it – I must have 500 million Euros then in my bank account now. Because I believe – okay, fooled myself – that I have a billion dollars in there. Now just to convince my bank manager about that for that loan for the yacht I want. Or maybe I just should not believe what a politician had said.

Another one I jumped on to highlight, is this one from Robin Sharma: “Clarity precedes mastery. Craft clear and precise plans/goals/deliverables. And then block out all else.” This hit a note with me, and Bruce Lee also said having laser-like focus on a goal is what makes ordinary people great people. In essence, you need to know where you are going, up to the dot so you can map it on Google Maps, metaphorically speaking. Your goal must be one only, and it must be crystal clear.

What will any book full of quotes – no, I'm not going to type out all 400 of them from the book, some sucks anyway – be without Mark Twain. One wise old jackal, that dude. The topic of fear gets discussed in length by every speaker, and we've all heard many quotes about it. Twain says: “Courage is not absence of fear, it is control of fear, mastery of fear.”

We all fear some things. When I read that, I briefly asked myself what will I be fearing tomorrow when I wake up. Going jogging, my inner voice replied. Seriously, I keep on postponing going for a daily jog every morning at daybreak. Why? Fuck knows. I'm proficient in aikido and it's a safe neighborhood and country, so I am really trying to figure out as I'm typing here what is holding me back from leaving home early in the morning for some exercise.

In the whole book, just two speakers talk about the importance of physical exercise, which I found really odd. Maybe the Roofing Tiles company guy that had put the quotes together is not a fan of exercise. But a healthy body harbors a healthy mind, right. And that is personal experience talking. Robin Sharma said, and I couldn't sum it up better: “Daily exercise is an insurance policy against future illness.” That is so true.

“Crush your fears with action”, Russel Frazier says. Yeah, I don't know if I would immediately jump on that action without proper thought beforehand, it sounds a bit rushed to me. Sure I want to go hit a guy – as an example – but to just jump into action may backfire without proper planning and a really strong belief in one's fighting abilities. And training. And preparation. So, keep the final action Rocky-style.

For me personally, my no. 1 secret to success is and always was, self-discipline. No matter your goals, plans, actions, and beliefs, without self-discipline to do what must be done whether you want to or not at the specified time you determined beforehand, you simply won't succeed.

For some reason I don't like Brian Tracy, maybe because his voice annoys me. But he is one sharp cookie, I'll give him that. He says: “Discipline is what you must have to resist the lure of excuses.” That latter part of his saying is worth pondering about.

Discipline is an unpopular topic, which is why motivational speakers tend to avoid the topic or talk around it. In my experience, it is the lack of self-discipline that is the sure reason why most people fail. You cannot get everything to reach a goal done in one day, so when you wake up on day 2, and day 7 and day 64, discipline is what you'll need to keep you going when your motivation or passion is a bit low that day. No time to motivate yourself, perhaps, but you need to take action, and for that having a strong sense of self-discipline is vital.

On a more upbeat note, John Wooden says, “Do not let what you cannot do, interfere with what you can do.” Good advice. Don't focus on the negative, focus on the positive, do what you can, and while you do it your brain will find a solution on how to do – or have it done – something you cannot accomplish yourself.

Me myself spent the whole week playing with new video editing software, because it was a hobby of mine years ago. But I'll never be good at video editing, although I'm very impressed with my efforts. So if I want to get serious about it, I'll either have to put in more days to learn the software and its huge array of available transitions and effects and filters and shit properly, or get someone to do the video editing for me. So far it is only a hobby, I want to spoof some music videos and have fun with some politicians. I may upload some amateurish videos to some sites in the nearby future.

Franklin said: “Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise.” Enough said. Think about it and form that routine. I'm trying, in inverse mode. LOL.

Quite a few of the many speakers in the book emphasize the importance of continuous, daily learning, and that fits me like a suit. I study every single day, something I thoroughly enjoy. Don't let me end up on Wikipedia, I only get out of there hours later. And I'm not just browsing, I'm making notes, then turn those notes into questions and answers, before adding it to the superb software Anki. Seriously, google that free open source program, and get the app too, and start using it. You'll do yourself a huge favor to learn anything faster and more efficient.

Heard of Jim Rohn before? Think I've heard his name the first time when I watched the religon-like movie The Secret, about the ‘Law’ of Attraction. That's no law, bullshit, man. But it is nevertheless a brilliant principle, to focus on what you want instead of on problems. That is the essence of that law.

Anyway, Rohn made the following quote famous: “Either you run the day, or the day runs you." To add to that, I'd like to say – and you can check it for yourself tomorrow – that ‘the first hour of each day determines the rest of your day.’ See, now I'm gonna become famous too. LMAO. Do not do social media on the potty on your phone the first hour after you wake up, use that hour to use a learning app or read a book or meditate or exercise, or something that will set you up for success.

Damn, how did this article get this long! And I still have to browse through 340 quotes to talk about the best ones I found. Maybe keep it for another article in the future, if enough readers – read: you – indicates that you like this one.

But let me close off here with a last quote, that I called the striker earlier, that touched me deeply: “You will not have a successful life surrounded by negative people.”

People gives off energy, either positive or negative. Or call it a vibe, if you want. But it affects everyone around them. If you are constantly in the presence of ‘bad’ energy, it will influence and poison your mind. How can you write a sales pitch, or study for an exam, or be creative, when someone is around that moan and bitch the whole time?

It is a form of emotional abuse you're being subjected to, and it is absolutely deadly to both your physical as your mental health. The best advice I have is, if you are in such a situation, is to get the fuck away from there.

I traveled several countries and experienced a lot, and I can tell you, there is nothing as bad as having negative people around you. And in all cases I've seen, it's always family subconsciously wronging other family members. For a variety of reasons, but nevertheless an unacceptable state of affairs that keeps on and on. Victims fear leaving that ‘comfort’ zone. Thus, the abuse continues.

I feel that if you are in such a situation, cut all ties with your family, do whatever you can, but do not let your family kill you slowly. Leave, change your circumstances, get away from toxic people. Time and health are your two most precious assets, don't let anyone take any of it from you. You deserve to laugh and be happy.

Hope you found this post insightful, and apologies for it being so long.

After getting the annoying 'insufficient resources message on Ecency, I had to go post this article on my one of my other blogs, the Steemit one, at https://steemit.com/hive-107252/@remil/do-not-let-your-family-destroy-your-fortune

I improved the title here, and I'll be so glad if you can upvote this article so that my resource credits can go up so I can write more. Do your good deed for the day. ;)

~TAGS:~
motivational, family, quotes, happiness, Law of Attraction, Napoleon Hill, Thomas Edison, Theodore Roosevelt, Brian Tracey, Benjamin Franklin, Mark Twain, Jim Rohn