Leaving the phase of being a child to becoming a youth and a grown up doesn't come with any manual. There is no enough guidiance to how one should go about it. Becoming an adult meets us unprepared, you just have to face it, live it, learn as you live and experience it. Truth be told, it is not that easy because you've not being there, it's your first time.
The only thing that seems like a default guide to adulthood and comes natural are the teachings and advice we have been getting mainly from our parents, then school, street and/or community and our religion. They are mostly parental guidance, basic morals, culture and the likes. Those are the only thing we literally have when we came into this phase; you gotta figure it out on your own.
This prompt reminded me of the time when it dawned on me that I am no longer a kid and could no longer act like one. People already had this sense of responsibility they expect from me. One of the first responsibility I performed was being available as the only son in the family. You know how the male child is expected to be or act the bravest, most active, more mentally and emotionally matured (even when we actually are not). I tried my best even when I doubted myself because I was scared of making mistakes; I was able to do well during the first few times and up till date I am doing very well in that aspect.
Another one was when I was the most musically oriented person amongst the musicians in my local church; I had to take it upon myself to impact others with the musical knowledge I have so we could grow better together.
The time shouldering a responsibility scared me the most was when I had to figure out so many things and make decisions myself. It started when I gained admission into the University. The first few two weeks I felt so bad and lonely because I stayed alone in one room apartment. Gradually, I started getting used to doing stuffs all by myself. God bless my parents; some months before I resumed Uni, I remember my mom calling me every night to the kitchen whenever she is about to prepare dinner for the night. I will stay with her till she finish cooking everything. My dad was in support of it too. At first it was annoying to me but later on, I loved it and got the hang of it. Now, this has been helping me till date, I cook myself and even prefer cooking to ordering food.
Dad retired and 8 months later, it felt like nothings is working anymore, mom's bisuness could not help so much. It affected how I relate with friends I got depressed and uninterested in many things. I couldn't believe I could no longer eat the way I want, buy what I like. At that point, I had so many deep thoughts about how to go about my life. Gradually, I became financial responsible for myself. I had to be smart about it. Thank God for Hive and graphic design, I can take care of myself to some extent; though I still get some money from home once in a while.
I didn't really see myself overcoming that challenge of being able to make some money myself, but I actually did because I tried; more because I know I wouldn't be able to live life well. Money is very important. I am glad I am making progress financially.
I've been in your shoe and know how uneasy it's no navigate adulthood or taking responsibility, especially when parents ain't able to perform most of their duties like they use to due to retirement and the likes.
Oh man. It's not easy navigating it. But thank God things are getting better.
Thank you boss for reading my post.
Is not easy been an adult. it's takes more than what u ecpect, the challenges of life and more