I think to some degree everyone is going thru something thses days and most of it are psychological. It good you're able to find a doctor to talk to and even be able to write honestly about them(like the murdering parts).

To be honest, my thinking process is very critical and hard to understand. I overthink, and panic, and my mind is always on the alert mode like it used to be when I was at War. The doctor told me it is normal because my body moved to a safe place but my mind is still in the survival process. I feel angry because whatever happened in my life was insane and I have no one to blame...

Most people keep them boxed inside thinking they can just go away and go about their daily life but eventually I think at some point it all comes back(stronger than before).

I was like that, I consumed and kept everything inside thinking in time all will be okay but I never understood that this would kill me inside...

I admit and I decided to be open so that I can heal...

Thank you...