@denmarkguy sent me here. I see I was already following your account, but I'll try to follow a bit more conscientiously and read what you share.

I haven't been through anything as traumatic as rape. I can't really relate except in the vaguest way of lesser instances of deeply personal violation. One of my siblings had been in a number of abusive relationships, and has trouble recognizing she is worthy of more than just another abusive jackass who will manipulate her. Sometimes I wish the solution was some kind of violent rampage worthy of a testosterone-pumped action movie. Such people probably should not be free to continue abusing and discarding vulnerable people. However, my upbringing is not one of violence, and I can't help but remember a line from Tolkien.

“Many that live deserve death. And some that die deserve life. Can you give it to them? Then do not be too eager to deal out death in judgement. For even the very wise cannot see all ends."

I have also known people who have managed to repent, learn, and grow after spending much of their lives as monsters. I hope the one who harmed you managed that, and I hope you will continue to recover amidst the reminders of the past.