Broken 💔 #1
If You really want to know how this Heart Break was self inflicted. Then you would have to go back and read my original post linked above.
I shared that post right here in the #weekend-experiences community. Please read it to fully understand how deep of an emotional scar this heart brake left me with and how it began with my first love.
This broken heart took over half of my lifetime to heal. My question to you the reader is. Does your first love ending in a broken heart ever really mend? Flesh wounds do but they leave a visible scar. But the scars we don't see. Those fucken scars. They are the worst.
I do envy those of you who are still with your first love. Do not ever let that go. If you have never been with another partner other than your first. That is a very rare and special thing.
Broken 💔 #2
Fast forward from where that Heart Brake #1 post had left us with a new school year starting and a freshly broken hearted Pennsyl-Tucky farm boy.
In that first several months of school daze things got really weird with my ex girlfriend and first lover Michelle. At the very first school event an evening gathering our school held once a month. We called it...
The Dance
I see what was once my girl hand in hand and dancing with B.C. a bro I considered a friend and He was giving me stink eye and cat like grins. So I see Billy's ex girlfriend with all her gal pals. In true young @krazzytrukker fashion I sprung into action. Within an hour me and "Candy"
Candace B. We were arm in arm and dancing like we were in love. Making sure My once girlfriend Michelle and her new boyfriend Billy Cole got a good look at us also. Little did I know at that time Bill would later in life be one of my best friends. I was his "Best Man" in his wedding many years later. But his wedding was not to my ex Michelle and it would be a tough year back at school with my freshly self broken heart.
That very next week during gym class I confronted Bill about Michelle. He laughed in my face and He told me she had been at his house after we had broken up and she was great in bed. I lost it. Even though Billy could easily have kicked my ass. I threatened to kick his. Again he laughed and walked away. I was so humiliated. I turned and gave my gym locker room locker a left hook punch. I felt the pain in my hand and the warm wetness of the blood. When I looked down at my hand it was covered in blood. My furthest to the left pinky finger knuckle had found an opening in the locker door and it peeled the skin back revealing my knucklebone. The string like tendons, bone and a large flap of skin peeled back and bleeding like crazy.
Off to the emergency room I went. 5 stitches to close that flap of skin. No tendons severed so I had full use of my pinky finger. There would not have been such a huge scar but I only made it a day or so before using my fists again on my cousin Mikes skull. Tearing all the stitches open and making my bandaged up hand a bloody mess again. I do not even remember what my cousin had said to send me into a teeneage hormonal rage. I was just a broken hearted young fool.
You know that old saying...
Chicks Dig Scars
Maybe the kind on your skin some might think are cool. Candy B the girl I was dancing with had a huge scar running up her huge 38DD chest from open heart surgery she had as a newborn baby. I did not dig it. I am not a chick. She never tried to hide it and was proud to be a survivor and would talk openly about it. She became a great friend also and we shared many fun times together later in life.
But the healing of emotional scars are not so easy for me. The scars that make it hard to trust and love again. Scars that I caused. Scars that never really healed.
The Scars
5 Stitches
The Knucklebone Scar
The Knucklebone Scar
The Thumb Scar from Original Heart Break/Summer of 79 Post
The Pookyville Cat Ranch Is extremely happy that @galenkp and his army of Hivonians who put the #weekend-engagement together decided to continue this concept into the New Year of 2025. Being an Army of One. I am sure G-Dog spends hours behind the scenes curating and keeping this community organized and safe for great Hivonians to share and engage. You Rock Bro.!!
Sammi Jo Agrees...
My hands are getting all torn up. Gotta remember to wear gloves when working with the firewood and furnace.
I wish I would have worn gloves more when I was younger. My hands are torn to shit with scars. Many from just what you are doing. 😉
It is difficult for those scars to heal, the ones inside, no doubt. I tried to go to that previous post and it gives me error. I don't know if the error is mine or the link is wrong. I will try again later.
Happy New Year @krazzytrukker.
I will check it out. Thanks for the info.
I fixed it. Now the one link will take you to the PeakD version. The other will open it in Hive.Blog
Ok!
Greetings!!
Well,
I thought guys didn't have these kinds of scars in their lives. But I see they even come with some on their skin.
For me it's a good sign, because it shows that people like you, love with passion.
Although sometimes, it is not very advisable to be so passionate...and it is better to control our emotions.But already at this age we have everything or almost everything is under control...😅
This type of scar is the connection to the past, just a memory that may or may not hurt, but that taught us how to live.
Have an excellent week.
I have a few neices and nephews and I see them doing the same stupid stuff I did back then. You can't tell em. They don't wanna hear it. Maybe they will read this someday and say hmmm..? Maybe They will realize it is not so bad being human and flawed. It took me almost a whole lifetime to realize this and the Hive posting due to @galenkp inspirations and the therapist Hivonians like yourself have helped with that realization. It is amazing writing this stuff down like we do and looking back at it later. It really is therapeutic.
Your post is amazing 🥇