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RE: The InkWell Writing Challenge | The Sweet Dreams

in The Ink Well3 years ago

Hello @defolumal,
I just read your story and was very impressed by its originality. Since you ask for feedback I will offer some of my impressions.

You have a wonderful story arc, and you flesh out the character, Rick Graaf, very well. You explain:

He was an emotional man, so witnessing people's dreams and subconsciouses; watching their desperate search for true love and seeing their excitement when they started to tell their dreams was very satisfying to him

The story is sort of mixed genre...science fiction and the fantastic. It works very well and reminds me of something Philip K. Dick might write. Except, you have a very light touch and there is no suggestion of the sinister here.

The end is satisfying and follows logically from what came before.

My one suggestion is that you edit more carefully. For example, you use "i" instead of "I" often. Writing Tip #21: Editing Your Work with Fresh Eyes, offers some good advice on how to go about editing.

It's a pleasure to read something that holds a surprise for me. Your story did. I wish you success in your future efforts and hope to read more of your work.

Regards,
AG

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Hello,

Thank you so much! That feedback means a lot to me. I'm kind of a newbie, so it's great to have some tips.
Will definitely check that out!

I love Philip K. Dick! Thank you for the comparison/complement :)

Hope to hear more of you.

🌟🌟