PANGS OF GUILT

in The Ink Well9 months ago

"Liam! Li-am!!" Mrs Pitz tapped at the door lightly and let herself in to her son, Liam's room.
"Why aren't you dressed yet? Are you okay? I've been calling your number but you wouldn't pick up. Did you not hear your phone ring?" she questioned.


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Looking around the room, her eyes caught sight of his phone, lying inches from him, "did you ignore my calls on purpose? You had me rushing down from the hospital, worried that something was wrong and..." He interrupted her.

"Mum, I have to tell you something. I-I can't do it," he had planned this delivery but now, his insides tightened and the words caught in his mouth.

"What? You can't do what?" she questioned.

"I can't be a blood donor for Lucious," he said, head bowed.

"Wh-why? You're our only hope of saving your brother from dying and..and.." Mrs Pitz panicked.

"How am i the only hope? Why are his chances of survival being vested on my shoulder?" Liam cried.

"Why are you being stubborn. This is your brother we're talking about. You can't be so heartless to let him die," she snapped.

"You won't understand, Ma. I just cannot be of help," he said.

"Make me understand pleaseee. Talk to me, darling. What is the matter?"

"I'm sorry, mum. I really am, but i can't do this," Liam said flatly.

"You are heartless! Worse than the devil. How could you!?" she thundered

"Oh, mum, please stop. This hurts me too, don't make it any worse. And..... I'm leaving, cause I know that the more time I spend here, the more pain it causes us both. Don't bother about me." Liam walked out and banged the door loudly behind him without turning to see the anguish that had overcome his mother.

With a small box on his right hand bearing a few of his things, he murmured as he headed down to the garage. He got into his car and drove off. He had no idea where he was headed but he had to go very far away from home - his family. He had disappointed them.

So he left.

He felt so much pain leaving behind a dying brother and a distraught mother.
His mother had kept insisting that he donates blood to his brother as 'theirs' matched perfectly. She couldn't do so herself because she wasn't their biological mother and hers didn't match.

Their father had married her because he needed someone to take care of them, after their mother died during their delivery. Eight years after, he died in a drunk-driving accident.

And then, just months ago, Lucious was diagnosed with Haemophilia, a blood disease.

...........................................................................

It was a cool Saturday evening, Liam sat in his patio, in his small rented apartment at the outskirts of town, sipping a soda from the can, when his phone rang.

"Hey, big guy, it's me Lucious," the caller paused.
Liam felt shivers down his spine.

"Lu - lu, Lucious, is that you,?" he stuttered.

"I just called to let you know that I'm totally fine now. No more hemo. I'll be throwing a big party this weekend, at home, to celebrate my comeback and I'd greatly appreciate and love it if you'd come back too. You're still part of the family" he continued.

Liam stayed silent. There were no words.

"And Liam, we miss you. Mom, mom missed you very much." Liam could hear his brother sniffing and he knew he was crying. "Please come home.." he concluded and dropped the call.

Long seconds after the line had cut, Liam still held the phone to his ear. It wasn't until he felty a salty wetness on his lips that he realized himself. He broke down and began to cry. His was a rush of emotions; excitement that his brother was alive and well and guilt for abandoning them when they needed him most. Yet, he was certain that he'd have maintained his stance in a repeat of that occurrence by same circumstances.

It didn't bother him that he had been termed self-centered.
Some had called to blast him. Some threatened. Others rained abuses. Everyone called him heartless. Wicked. The black sheep who would rather watch his twin and only brother die.
But only if they knew...
Only if they knew that he had tested positive for HIV.

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Thanks for gracing this post.
Greetings!

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I am speechless and it would have been really difficult for Liam to have abandoned his brother but he didn't have a choice. Its sad he can't share his reasons with anyone.

He had no choice so he had to do what he had to do.

Thanks for reading

woah, this was sad to read, at least the brother go better ,he should have explained his situation though

I think the reason he didn't tell them his situation was that it might make things worse.
It would especially be more heartbreaking for his mother

Hmmm you have a point there.

Your story is so clear that I was able to picture Liam, bro really felt sad but it's tough opening up on such thing. No brother would love to see his sibling die when he can actually help.

That was a sad one, this is really emotional.

He did what he knew was best. It must have been really tough on him and he had no option.

I'm glad you liked the story too.
Thanks for coming around.

Something very serious must be happening for Liam to abandon his twin brother and the family that loved him so much. He himself could not face his own illness and chose to keep it a secret. We imagine he returns home and with family help everyone is fully restored to health.

It might not just be the virus. I want to think that it's all the mental pressure. It's all just two hard on one person.