The Love That Never Was

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The highlife band played gently in the background, echoing around the hall. Kemi hummed to the sound of the familiar tune, her eyes scanned through the sea of familiar faces. Each wore memories of time and friendship that were lost. She couldn't believe that after all these years, she still found herself as the odd one at her school reunion.

She adjusted her gown and walked towards the door. She was going to head home and dump herself in bed. Then she'll act like the reunion never happened. But just a few steps to the door, she heard a familiar voice.

"Leaving so soon?"

She froze and was in her tracks. Even without turning, she could tell who had that voice. It just was weird to her that after all these years, he still had the same voice.

Gently she spun around to face him. Apart from his voice which was still the same, he looked different. His once boyish face was now replaced with a neatly trimmed beard and slight streaks of grey hair.

She tried to speak, but the memories of their time together in school somehow held her mouth shut. From the early days of stealing glances at each other in class to sneaking out after school hours to spend time at the school gym house alone. People envied how a famous guy like him would stoop so low to fall in love with a loser like her. He made her fight her insecurities. Till one day, he vanished into thin air with a letter, text or call. Nothing for her to hold back on as the reason he disappeared. Then the rumours spread that she had bewitched him with her bad luck.

Now he has reappeared fifteen years after and was standing right here, smiling and acting like all is well between them.

“Femi,” she called softly.

"Kemi," he replied. "Look at you. You look great" he added.

But Kemi never said a word in return. She just stood there staring at him like she had seen a ghost.

"Can we find a seat? I think we need to talk" he pleaded.

Kemi seriously resisted the urge to cuss at him. He owes her some explanation, but there he was standing before her, thinking that they needed to talk.
"I don't think we need to talk. I think you owe me an explanation on why you left" she spoke softly but with rage.

"I know. But can we at least sit down and discuss it?" Femi said. "Please" he pleaded.

Reluctantly Kemi agreed and asked him to lead the way. They found a seat at the far end of the hall. Just in a corner where they could hear themselves speak. Making sure she was comfortably seated, Femi excused himself. He returned with a glass of wine.

"Here, it's your favourite", he said, handing it over to her.

Kemi forced a smile, "You still remember"

“Although it's been Fifteen years, right? I can never forget,” he said smiling.

Kemi nodded without a smile on her face. If he couldn't forget her favourite drink, he could at least tell her why he left with a goodbye. It pained her most that after all these years of meeting him now, she still felt a thing for him. She had tried suppressing the emotions these few minutes they met but she just couldn't bring herself to stop.

"Why?" She couldn't help anymore as those escaped her mouth. She was dying to know why. “Femi, why did you leave without a text, message or explanation why you left? I called and texted. I even drove down to your house but was told you relocated. Why?” she asked, looking at her glass of wine while rubbing her fingers in its rim.

Gradually Femi's smile faltered. "It's a long story".

"I have time," she replied. Her words firm, her countenance unflinching.

"Look, I was just trying to protect you"

"From what or who?" Kemi yelled. She didn't want to, but her emotions got hold of her. She took a deep breath and apologised.

Femi modded. He didn't react. He knew she had every right to act the way she did. They had shared something more than any college couple back then, and he was sorry he left her that way, but he had his reasons. With a soft voice, he replied
"I was protecting you from me"

"What does that even mean?" Kemi asked, confused.

"After the death of my parents, I lost my job too. The only thing that kept me in school. I had younger ones to fend for. I was a mess. But you, you had it all under control. An ambitious girl with a bright future ahead of you plus a family that loved you. I didn’t want to drag you into my chaos.” he paused and leaned forward on his chair. "Trust me when I say that I loved you and still do. It was tough for me to make that decision, but I just didn't want to ruin your life."

Kemi sniffed hard. "You should have let me decide if I wanted to stick around than be a coward and run away. I spent years thinking I was the problem. Thinking I wasn't enough or if I did something wrong. You clearly have no idea how your actions hurt me". She felt her chest tighten, her voice trembling.

"I'm so sorry" Femi apologised.

"And why didn't you reach out to me when things got better?* she asked, this time looking him in the eye.

"I was ashamed of what I did. Besides I felt you've moved on". He admitted, his eyes soft with regret as he played with his glass of wine.

Kemi studied him closely. He truly has changed with the years. The once brave young boy she fell in love with was now scared of life and even looking her in the eye.
"I never moved on, Femi", her voice showing vulnerability.

A smile cut across his face as he looked up at her. "So, does that mean I still have a chance to make amends?" He asked with a spark in his eyes.

Her eyes met his as she felt that spark that was missing between them return. But suddenly, reality dawned on her
"No, Femi. No. I mean, I still love you, but I'm afraid we have to move on without each other. I'm just glad I found the closure I needed after all these years". With that, she stood up, grabbed her purse and walked out of the hall. This time for good.

Femi watched as she walked out of him and out of the hall. He felt a tear drop from his eyes. Then he gulped down his glass of wine. Although he felt defeated at that moment, he was sure within himself that he wasn't going to give up on her.