Unhappily investing everafter ( or it's late and I can't think of a better title)

My wife an I have an agreement when one of us wants to but something non-essential (beyond a small purchase of a few dollars) the other can also take the same amount of money for themselves.

Most of the time (at least 90%) my wife is the one who wants to initiate the buying while I would rather save the money, not because I'm cheap but because I am tired of working at a dead-end job (that pays well) to constantly throw it all away on needly items and start the process over again.

I've made a few purchases here and there, Items I felt were worth the time and effort, (a used bike, a top of the line blender...steem monster cards) but for the most part, I simply tucked my dollars away and put them out of my mind. Most of the things I am into are free or nearly so. (drawing, writing, running, spending time with my son)

I recently counted my stash, it was surprisingly more then I expected. I still did not want to spend it but I also didn't want it to just sit there collecting dust. I thought I could put it to work for me in the stock market.

I reopened my Robinhood account and deposited the funds. I choose a few stocks, I made a small number of gains. I'm sure in time I could make considerably more gains, investing in dividend-paying stocks and all.

But the thing is, despite the gains and all... I don't really like investing that way anymore. I mean I use to enjoy investing and researching the companies. but this time around, not so much.

Usually when I get this feeling of not being satisfied, no satisfied does not seem like the correct word. When the inner voice tells me that I am on the wrong path (better) usually that means it is time the shut up and listen to it.

which makes me wonder what I should do, what should I invest in? Crypto, myself (books,ect...) or maybe stack in under a rock for a raining day.

Maybe I need to shut up and listen,(and breath) I might tell myself something worth listening too.

~Meditations~