By our very nature we are inclined to measure contentment by the proportion of our satisfied desires. But there are two inequivalent facets of being content:
You can have everything you want - or want everything you have
Epictetus argues that the more refined approach to a happy life is to adhere to the second idea. By putting our mind at unrest by the strive for ever more unattainable desires we are destined to become enslaved to irrationality and destined for eventual disappointment.
A truly free and self-determined state of mind may only be achieved by emancipating ourselves from excessive desires. That does not mean lowering your ambitions in life to a minimum, but appreciating the things in life which you already enjoy. So instead of wasting our time by satisfying our potentially insatiable desires, the diligent adherent of stoicism should take is time to reflect upon the things in life he actually needs to be happy. (Which of course, according to Epictetus, should not be comprised of much more than philosophy itself)
So if you happen to find yourself driven by your wants, take a step back and ask yourself if satisfying them would truly help you in your pursuit of contentment and which desires you have to discard to regain control of your happiness.
References for further reading
- Epictetus, Discourses, The Internet Classics Archive
nice post