It has been a year and 3 days now being a single mother. It has been a wonderful time with my daughter until now. We have a lot more freedom instead of being stuck in the house all day long on the weekend. I used to be working most of the time every weekend but now I am spending more time with my daughter. It is a lot better than working but then, we do not have enough expenses for our monthly needs. I have cut a lot of unnecessary items from our expenses and yet we are still struggling.
Well that is not the main story for today but I just want to let out the heaviness I felt inside.
We are currently sick and still struggling to get better especially with thick phlegm. Luckily we do not have fever. please no fever again this year. I miss the moment where we rarely get sick.
I wonder if we can go back to that moment again. As for now, I enjoy the moment hiking with my daughter.
I do not have a very good breathing endurance and I can easily get palpitation when I am tired, but when I am with my daughter, I feel like I can breakthrough anything. She can make me run during hiking and to avoid that, I never want to let go of her hand except when she said she want to take picture.
She kind of love taking picture of herself. She is the woman I am missing in myself. I hope I can teach her and give her a better version of myself from now on. Being separated with my husband is the best decission I ever make in my whole married life.
I wanted to get a divorce but then I felt guilty of disrespecting my own religion and faith. I do not need to get married again therefore I think that divorce is unnecessary for now. I can always be someone wife in title and forever a mother of one. I do hope he let us free.
My daughter is my strength therefore I can breakthrough anything. How about you?
If you read until here do leave a comment below.
Above is the map of kopungit hill in Kota Kinabalu, sabah. It is located near Hospital Queen Elizabeth, the twin tower hospital in Kota kinabalu.
Hey dear sister. Nice to see your positive attidude.
In my opinion, coughing up phlegm is the body expelling toxins. My understanding is that the body protects itself from the harmful effects of cooked food by producing mucous. Perhaps you have been eating less, or eating less cooked food, so the body no longer needs to protect itself so much so is expelling it in this way.
Fasting is an extremely effective way of healing the body by the way, especially when combined with colon cleansing (and breath-work). i can send you a link to a guided breathwork audio if you like, which may well also help with your breathing endurance.
Sat Nam
Atma
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Love hearing your positivity. I didn't mind being a single mum - it was better than being unhappy. I'm glad you are happy about it - much better than being with someone you don't love and that makes your life worse than it could be!
True. It is better to be happy than to have a partner that always disagree with Everything.