Sounds like your spouse suffered major anxiety issues. I am not quite as bad. I have never been hospitalized for it, but I sympathized with her. I know it can feel like fish out of water unable to breath. It really is not something people can't understand unless they have gone through it themselves.
You are right. We all have different struggles. True friends will never judge or define you by the demons you struggle with.
You know... Your reply reminded me of my former brother-in-law, Rick Cimpher. He trained with the British Commandos and was a father figure for me when I was a teen. He taught me how to fish, shoot, etc. My sister ruined his life though. He got hooked on crack and died of a heart attack in his late 40's. He had weaknesses, but I will never forget what he did for me. I highly respected him. He was dealt a really crappy hand though, and people kept breaking his heart.
Every warrior has their strengths and weaknesses. As long as they're a warrior, their particular weaknesses don't make them less in my eyes. I'll do everything I can to help them too.