we cling, we tense we produce force based on instinct or memory
just one thing
what about fun, what about our unique sensitivity and our unique curiosity that matches perfectly to our ability

when we tune that, grow that practice that, we may know joy
we become un predictable in our action and our creations surprise and delight even our "selves".

really we have just tuned our fascia and synapses to be sensitive or one with a small part of something vast - not self but fractal, and much better than terminal anyway...

when we become a collection of rigid opinions - opposite, then we are dreamy and reactive, we get upset easily - then we are automaton.