My birthday is coming up in the near future, I'm going to be turning 157 years old (ok, not really but sometimes it feels that way)...I'll be turning much less than 157 years old and in my usual style I don't want anything made of it. I've written about why before so won't go over it all again, I guess I just don't like being the centre of attention. I don't mind birthdays, I just don't like making a big deal of my own.
This, of course, removes the ability for people around me to do what makes them happy and in the case of my partner that's making something special happen on my birthday.
She told me she wants to do something for my birthday a few evenings ago, in a delusional moment that doesn't compute to me because she knows I'm always going to say no...and I did, but she persisted.
This all happened over text message as I was away from home travelling for work and in the process she called me selfish...of course she didn't mean it in the literal sense of the word, she was just disappointed that I was reluctant to do something for my birthday yet again and was trying to guilt me into giving her the permission to arrange the plan she had in mind.
Anyway, I thought I'd share the text message thread because I've not done this for a while.
That's it folks...well, that's as much as I'm going to show you anyway. As you can see she was persistent, I was adamant...and then fucken relented because it was a battle I was never going to win despite initially holding hopes that I would (for once) get my way in the matter; sometimes I wonder why I bother resisting.
Do you like celebrating your own birthday or not? Either way, tell me about it and explain a little if you feel inclined do comment.
Design and create your ideal life, tomorrow isn't promised - galenkp
[Original and AI free]
Image(s) in this post are my own
I don't really celebrate my birthday, but then again I don't really mind if we do either. Honestly, I don't really have that many friends who would come to celebrate anyway. A lot of times my wife and I just go away alone for our birthdays which are nine days apart.
I like your style, if anything is done for mine it's just my girl and me (usually) as I refuse anything more. Best that way, I prefer her company over other people's. You get it, I know.
I totally get it! It's funny sometimes because I worry I am neglecting my other friends to be with my wife, but honestly at the end of the day and the end of our lives, we only have each other, so why not make that a priority.
Keep doing what you're doing man, it's righteous and exactly for the reason you mention.
People need to know who matter, who really matter, and we live in a society where that's often blurred and skewed by the clutter of social media and the discontent and dissatisfaction people often feel...making them seek it elsewhere. I was talking about this with a girl from work today...an interesting conversation.
Thanks, I appreciate that!
I hope your wife doesn't see this.
Haha! I concur.
ha ha ha ha this is better than reading a novel, my respects to your partner galenkp I am not so patient without songs, birthdays, no cakes and no people or gifts. You are somewhat complicated, and interesting.
Lol, complicated and interesting, hmm, I'll take that, am ok with it. 🤔🤪
Yes, I definitely like to celebrate my birthday. But similar to your method I do not like the group party, singing or really others at all (wife is optional, dog is ok :) For me, that is MY special day. I seldom take time or money to do anything for myself, and seldom have I allowed others to do for me either. I don't really care for surprise gifts or any gifts from others, I tend to choose something special for myself and allow it to be classified as "from" others. I've become quite particular at my age about the things I want about me taking up space. Especially after all the moves! Everyone has told me I am hard to buy gifts for and I tell them "So stop!" Because I do feel a bit of remorse when I throw them away or give them away a month later and then get the item or version I really wanted. Yes, I'm a bit obsessive about researching things I want not always having to get the best, but definitely what I feel is the best for my needs and price. Too many years of reviewing and buying technical hardware and software that must meet specific requirements I suppose. (or maybe, just maybe I'm a bit off) Nah, that can't be it. lol -- There, that's a longer reply than I've typed in 4 months, so guess it tripped a trigger and I had a few moments time. Happy Bday to you lalala Happy Bday to you lalala :)
I think you've hit the nail on the head, it's your day and should be treated as such - you should be permitted to do, or not do, as you wish.
On the gift thing, it can be a little awkward and, like you, I have particular tastes and needs so can be difficult to buy for as I also like to research and also know what I already have and what might compliment it. I understand that some people get enjoyment from the gift giving though, it makes them feel good to give them. I get it.
I'm going to accept the whole birthday thing and know there will be no cake and candles, no fucken singing and no one but the two of us, just the way I like it.
No worry....u celebrate it, assuming it to be mine....I think it falls in 2 days....right .? 🎂...no singing, no cakes,...but great you accepted the surprise deal...sometime, it gets good to listen to the beautiful things happen to your life....and you know she gonna make it special in her own style......
Mine is not in a few days but is close. I'll submit to the plans my partner has, it's unavoidable - I was never going to win that one - and take it in my stride. There's worse things I guess right?
I am waiting to see all the surprises it going to happen on the special day...it must going to be very eventful, as far as I smell it from distant...😉
I have the opposite expereince. My birthday is New Years Eve and the older I got the more pissed off I got that I didn't have a special day. Everyone was out celebrating anyway. Plus it's right on the back of Christmas and other family birthdays so it feels like there's no energy to celebrate.
So, about 6 or 7 years ago my family decided to ignore my birthday completely, leat it as New years Eve, and celebrate in June instead. So now, like the Queen I have an official birthday on June 30th. It's brilliant. Always a great family day out. plenty of energy, decent weather and much more choice about what we do.
I get that, makes sense...what a shit day for it...I guess the 29th February would also be bad (a birthday every 4 years).
I like your Queens Birthday approach, makes it special and give's y'all a (good) excuse to get out and do something fun! Legit concept. Maybe I should do the same, but make the day the 29th February so I only have to worry about it on the leap years.
Most people with leap year birthdays celebrate on the 28th don't they? I wonder how many of them suffer disappointment when they finally get to celebrate on the 29th and everyone forgets and sends them cards and pressies on the 28th. 😂
That makes sense, my comment probably didn't. 🤔🤪
Yeah, I think it's a complication one doesn't need in life, damn leap years.
Your comment made perfect sense my mind just wandered off to leap year birthdays. 😂
nice of you to compromise for her!!!
yes you don't like it... but hey, you're together and you're making her so happy! love is sacrifice at times, right? hehehe
I don't mind celebrating my birthday, I just often don't do it in traditional ways. and I like it just fine that way! hubby has his bday about a week before mine so we do something together.
I don't mind gifts but I really love the ones that people show theyve actually listened to what's going on in my life since the last bday .. that makes me feel very loved
I hope she makes it very special for you and that it makes you feel appreciated despite it all..hehehe
I hope your year ahead is fantastic and one for the books!!!
no cake...but outdoors stuffs! 🤗
🚣🏞️
Compromise is one of the elements of a successful relationship, makes sense to do it right?
I don't hate my birthday I guess, it's done nothing to deserve that, I just don't like the attention I suppose. My partner knows that so I am probably in safe hands, I doubt she'd go out of her way to make me feel uncomfortable; we'll know soon enough I suppose huh?
We all have our ways I guess, yeah even you, and that's totally fine. What I don't like is when people push theirs upon others. I just don't feel inclined to make other people feel like they have to celebrate the day upon which I emerged from my mothers womb.
I don't like celebrating my birthday, but I definitely don't want working on my birthday. So I usually file for a vacation leave and just do nothing at home. Maybe I'll play video games, or watch movies. I just don't like making a big deal of it.
So many people don't like working on their birthday, I get it too. My partner never does, but I don't really care...I work, or not, makes no difference. This year it's a Sunday so I'll not be working.
I was in a company before where there was a birthday leave. People can use it on the day of, or days close to the birthday.
Yeah, most companies do that here too.
Oh that's nice. It isn't common in the Philippines.
Really? I guess it depends on profit margins and all.
I don't like to celebrate my birthday either but in most cases, I had to submit. Unlike popular ways, I am strict about gathering and all those cake things, most I do is spending quality times with dear ones and a small treat to close friends. Hope you get to enjoy your upcoming birthday your own way, with family and friends, no exaggerated festival.
It seems you have a sensible approach to it; many do not. I heard there's a trend towards people (social media people) celebrating their "birthday month!" What the actual fuck?
Birthday month?! Literally, wth.... I don't even share whatever i am doing, forget birthdays and other stuff. Some people are way too social i guess, may be i don't fit, my fault 😄
Way too social...and way too selfish.
wow happy bday in advance! You'll have a great birthday by the looks of it.
I'm probably same as you. I don't really need some big celebration. Birthday singing is cringe, cakes are overrated but I wouldn't mind some nice dessert. I'd be fine by myself just enjoying some nice food. everybody's different though
That happy birthday song is terrible man, makes me want to vomit. I don't fucken get why people like it.
We're all different as you say, some people love all that shit but not me, if anything it's a very quiet dinner or something, no fucken birthday references.
ya i agree with you especially when it's being played in public and the staff at restaurant singing to the birthday person ya that's embarrassing. i feel like i made a post on that before but i don't recall
Oh man, it takes all my strength of will not to kill them all. Ok, maybe that's not exactly true, but you know what I mean. I think the over-doing of the birthday thing (by the person themselves) is a cry out for attention. Fair enough I guess, I just don't need it want that attention.
wait what. I mean like celebrate quietly by myself no cake or anything. just enjoy my day maybe go see a movie and have a nice dinner by myself. I'm not trying to get attention! just trying to have a special day for myself. It's like treating myself hey I survived another year I'm doing good keep it up. I'm not sure if any of this makes sense haha.
I wasn't talking about you, I was speaking generally.
ah I see. then I don't know hah. some people just need it.
You talking about your age freely makes you seem so spirited - like you know how long is your lifespan that you chose to savor every bits of moments you could.
After all, the lifespan of a human isn't that long compared to elves.
I guess I just know that I will die at some stage, maybe even today I guess, I could have a heart attack or vehicle accident or something like that. Knowing my life isn't endless means I work harder to get the best out of each day.
...and you just ignored the elves 🙃
1 owner, great deal. Slight water damage.
Haha, legit! I'll give ya fifty bucks.
I don't really like celebrating my birthday, either... but we always end up having a celebration. My family and friends suddenly ambush me at home with food and surprises. I appreciate them, though... but being sang the birthday song always makes me feel awkward... like, what should I do at that time? So I end up singing as well to break the awkwardness. XD Anyway, your wifey is so sweet and she knows you too well!
Ambushed huh? Sounds horrible...almost as horrible as the happy birthday song is. 😆
Yes... my friends invite themselves! haha
But then again, they're just too used to coming over. (since I'm practically a hermit.. lol)
Hehe, I smiled while reading the conversation between you and your woman.
I don't celebrate my birthdays, although they mean so much to me in my heart of hearts I still go about my usual activities. Hehe
Why don't you celebrate your birthday if it means so much to you?
Well, It's just a choice😃.
Oh gosh! Why are you give her ideas? Lol!
I am quite neutral - it's a special day but I don't go all out to celebrate it. However, if there is something planned for me, I would happily accept it as long as it is not too outrageous.
Some like to go all out and others a low key celebration, I guess whatever is right for the individual, and that can certainly change with time or circumstances. I prefer to let the day pass unnoticed l, but my partner doesn't let that happen.
I think I can say: happy birthday in advance. Notice I don't sing it! But I do understand your feelings. My partner has the same thing. He doesn't hate his birthday, but he doesn't feel like celebrating it either. The first time we went on a trip together, we went to a shelter to meet our Dutch Shepherd girl Lana. When we got back from there he told me it was his birthday. His gift to himself had become Lana. In all the years that followed, he never wanted to celebrate his birthday, but with just the two of us together and the dogs we did celebrate Lana Day until she passed away a few weeks ago.
I'm sorry to hear that Lana passed away, I know how tragic that can be, losing a pet. You had many good years with her though and the memories that go with them...a really good reason to continue to mark Lana Day moving forward. And yep, it sounds like your chap is exactly the same about his birthday as I am.
Lana Day will always be remembered, and yes we had many great years with her. Cancer sucks!
Yeah, my guy is the same, he spoils me on my birthday but doesn't want to celebrate his birthday because he doesn't want to be the center of attention.
Exactly how I feel too.
That much I could read in between the lines in a lot of your blogs already.
She wants to do something special for you because you deserve it, that's so sweet of your partner and yeah I'm glad she had her way.
I really don't celebrate my birthday but my children make all the fuss about it ☺️
Well, your kids probably get a good feeling from doing so and you probably deserve it to. Take it while it's there. 😁
Personally, I really don't mind birthdays. I feel it's the ladies that take it more seriously. Most of the guys I know don't really care if it's celebrated or not.
Well, what do you expect? Women love attention so it's not surprising.
I give my girl loads of attention, she returns it. 😏
I know😅. Her persistence said it all.
Man, I thought you were getting a Ferrari for your birthday. Sheesh! That would've been something. 😎
Who said I didn't?
I hope you're being serious here. 😬
I'm always mostly usually serious.
Hopefully, we'll see a few sneak peeks of the Ferrari from here on then. 🤔
I don’t like celebrating my birthdays and I like celebrating it again but just with the people that I am close to, like your style. Lol My birthday is a day I reflect on how my year went and the sad thing is I mostly think about things I didn’t achieve so I always blame myself that I could have done better
Rather than blame yourself, maybe you should evaluate and determine better ways to move forward, and make plans to do them, which will possibly make the upcoming year batter than the last.
I don't mind having my birthday celebrated. Mostly it's just by my family and not some big fancy affair and I like celebrating them too !
It hasn't seemed like any of my family minded being celebrated mostly except about the time my older brother turned 55, he did announce that he no longer needed them acknowledged and he said it with a serious face, so he meant it, but I never understood why. Did something happen that hurt him about a birthday celebration that he didn't share or was his age depressing to him?? I have no idea and now he's gone ! My older sister doesn't mind being celebrated, but not out in public.....LOL
To each their own I suppose, but it does take the fun out of it for those that would like to celebrate someone they love if they adamantly refuse to participate. Kill Joys ! Party Poopers ! Scrooges.... the whole LOT of them !
I mean.... he who has the most birthdays wins..... right ???
It's not only good to be a cheerful giver, but a cheerful receiver as well.
I have to agree 100 percent with your Girl.
Family affairs are the way to go in my mind I guess, it's more relaxed and more personal which I prefer.
In my situation, I'm not about to deny my partner the enjoyment she gets from it and will have a good time whatever she has planned, but it suited me to make it a little difficult for her, just so she knows I've not rolled over completely. 😁
Oh... and happy birthday whenever it was/is.
🎂
I'm pretending I'm family, don't throw the cake, ok???
Lol...I could go some real cake right now...I'll pretend the emoji is real and fake eat it!
(It's not happened yet, coming up in the not too distant future though...another year older. Sucks really, but I'll own it.)
I hope you enjoyed your fake cake eating. I just KNEW that would be your favorite flavor.
When considering fussing about birthdays, I always think EMBRACE IT !.....because the alternative is not a good one. :)
So tasty. 🤔🙄
Look .... I would tell you to stop saying no... you can't beat a woman! I'm really telling you and I think you checked it out. Give her your approval, she does it with love, I know what I'm talking about.
In my case I do like to celebrate it but very simply, an outing, a cake, something special at home, a small get-together. Nothing big, but it is special. We celebrate life, arriving in this world... for whatever reason, we'll find out later, but we're here and people love us. Why not do something special.
Do you turn 157? Ok I'll be 146 hahaha and soon... that's March... ok, signed up! Too bad I don't know the exact day hahaha
The date? It's the 34th of March.
Ok, not really.
To be honest I don't like to say when it is, few even in my real life even know. I like it that way. How about you, do you go around disclosing your birth date?
Ok I'll add the two digits and I'll get only one hahahahahahaha
Relax... I understand, you don't need to tell me the day. I respect every opinion.
My birthday? June 27th, I was born in 1978. No problem.
1978? You bloody young spring chicken you. I'm way older.
hahahahaha but I already told you! 146 years... it's not little!
Well, in truth I'm only going to be 97, on the 32nd of March; mark it on your calendar so you don't forget.
Alright, it's already marked... 5th March!🤣
You had to lose that war and it was decided, good for you that you succeeded with your terms. Hehe.
I do celebrate my birthdays (well, not me but some special person). Events don't matter but the person making it happen for you matters a lot, like that special person of yours made you surrender and you were never gonna say a yes if it wasn't her.
Btw I noticed the time difference in text and reply (you were willing a bit by heart) hmmm😉😉
Oh and yes, here is a little poem for you
Roses are read
Violets are blue
Happy birthday in advance to you 🎉
One must know when to retreat, I like to call it an advance to the rear, and live to fight another day. In this situation losing the battle or, winning sub-optimally as I like to say, will result in some sort of event that I'll probably not mind at all, so it's not too bad.
Do you have Chuck E Cheese in Australia?
Nah, we don't.
you might have to open one!
No worries mat, I like celebing my birthdaa
Today is that day for me 😄
fter a whole day of work, I feel like it's my 98th birthday...
I don't like public performances, I'm not a good speaker and when there's a big gathering I try to stay away.
I couldn't do that today.
I was the central figure 🥳
There were over 35 of us in the company (in addition, we had some business partners from the Czech Republic), so, with the intention of diverting attention from the topic of "Dusko's birthday", I prepared a service (a massive barbecue), after which they forgot who they were and where they were :-)
Tonight I have to go out to a restaurant with my wife. I've gotten by without picking out a present for now, but I'm afraid tonight when we have dinner I'll be under pressure, just like you 🙂
Today is that day for me 😄
fter a whole day of work, I feel like it's my 98th birthday...
I don't like public performances, I'm not a good speaker and when there's a big gathering I try to stay away.
I couldn't do that today.
I was the central figure 🥳
There were over 35 of us in the company (in addition, we had some business partners from the Czech Republic), so, with the intention of diverting attention from the topic of "Dusko's birthday", I prepared a service (a massive barbecue), after which they forgot who they were and where they were :-)
Tonight I have to go out to a restaurant with my wife. I've gotten by without picking out a present for now, but I'm afraid tonight when we have dinner I'll be under pressure, just like you 🙂
Any day there's a BBQ at work is a good day right? No matter the occasion.
Hopefully your dinner is a good one and you have had a decent day overall. Happy birthday...you don't look a day over 97. 🤪
Thanks 😀