Not that I'm rich but I'm happy to say this fear has finally been conquered or at least doesn't scream quite so loudly.
It never is about being rich. Look at the mighty and powerful -- no amount of wealth seems to be enough, as long as that fear remains, so props to you for seeing the root of the problem, and getting after it.
What you say about time comes at an interesting juncture, I was just thinking about it. I spent all of yesterday morning "lounging about in my pjs" :D And I felt blissfully happy. I tend to take an utilitarian approach, often, and marshal myself into writing, going places, whatever. But yesterday, I felt I really want to stay here and continue reading this book (it was Patti Smith, to be fair, kind of a given). So I gave myself that and hey presto. The afternoon writing flowed much more smoothly than if I'd fought myself out of bed and into "productivity mode".
Being able to take those months in Europe (obviously also resource-related, but still), or to lounge about in pjs, or decide to do whatever the fuck you want with your time when you want to is the most free a person can be. :)
I'd take this from your writing here, though, it's a treasure how aware you are of this. Such a treasure -- so many people aren't aware of any relationship, good or bad, with any of their resources. So the fact that you're assessing and seeing what needs work is already a good sign, my friend :) I wish you luck (and freedom) in your journey.
It's not totally about being financially comfortable but I think having to worry about money less frees up more bandwidth for acknowledging and working on other things.
I'm so glad that we're able to enjoy that and experience the benefits of it! It's so important when you're a writer to be in a good place, so the muse can flow freely. Meditation helps me but I there are times when I have to physically exhaust myself to get to that place of relaxation and contentment. It's the best feeling in the world when it happens!
Thank you, my friend! I feel very lucky to be aware of all this. I wish there was a way to wave a magic wand and make others see it too.
I think there is. By being. By not hiding your awareness, you inevitably make others see it, even sometimes without going out of your way to pull them by the hand and say "over here". :) Who knows who read this just now and it got wheels spinning in their heads :)
I hope, at least.
I love that! : ) That's my hope sometimes that something I've written will be that tiny spark that ignites a fire in someone. The world could handle less people going through the motions and sleepwalking through their lives.